got a good joke?

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I am one of those people who has heard many jokes but remembers none. Well, none except the most disgusting or childish jokes.

I figure there have to be some in countries other than my own which I haven't heard already so fire away!

For example (told to me by my daughter):

Q: Why is 6 afraid of 7?
A: because 7 8 9

 

So pretty much you want us to say lame ittle kid jokes? If so here is one.

Where does the boat go when he get's sick?

To the Doc.

Please respond to tell me if this is what you meant.

 

A man walked into a bar. Ouch. Ho. Ho.

...

Why can't Sir Yerril spend more time with his special Laydee?

Because they both have too much homework!

 

thats okay Sir Yerril...

now... On to the joke...

What sucks about being a Baldwin?

.
.
.
NOTHING!!

Sorry, I just have a Southpark hangover... Just had to say it!

[ September 01, 2002, 15:58: Message edited by: sick_curtain ]

 

ANY joke is fine by me, but I don't know where the moderators would draw the line.

 

I guy walks into a supermarket. There he askes the nice girl who is working there: Do you sell Nails? No the girl replies. Oh in that case, I'm in the wrong joke!

 

There are two pieces of bacon sizzling in a pan. One piece turns to the other and asks,"Hows it going?" Then the other piece of bacon says,"OHH MY GOD! THIS PIECE OF BACON IS TALKING!"

 

FRODO:Gandalf, what is the password?

GANDALF:Umm, I do not know. I'll try to figure out.

2 HOURS LATER

GANDALF:Aha! MELON!

*The doors of Moria turn into giant melons*

 

I love it! Sounds like some good ol' homemade humor.
Here's another one:

Q. Did you just pick your nose?

A. No, I was born with it.

har, har

 

Once there was a little girl with two blue ribbons growing out of her nose.
A weird case, since Jupiter was written on one and Mars on the other.

 

Three old ladies were sitting on a park bench when a man jumps out the bushes and flashes at them. On the spot two of them had a stroke. The other couldn't reach

 

when i was younger we used to have a joke that goes like this:

Q. why did the kid goat cry?
A. because his mother has a beard.

 

I don't get your joke Ragusa. Please explain.

I asked the lord for a flower and he gave me a garden, I asked the lord for a tree and he gave me a forest, I asked the lord for an arshole and he gave me your number.

I'm at the police station for speeding. Urine sample test possitive, would of been charged for drink driving so I stole the sample and now I've been charged for taking the piss! :skake:

[ September 06, 2002, 21:42: Message edited by: Lady Loulex ]

 

A blonde was in a hotel when she heard that there was a magic mirror - if you told it something true it would reward you , told it a lie and it sucked you into oblivion.

The blonde went downstairs and there were to women there already the first said -
"I think I am the prettiest woman in the world"
phht! she was sucked into oblivion. the second said
"I believe I am the sexiest woman in the world"
phht! she was sucked into oblivion, the blond stood in front of the mirror and said -
"I think..."
phht! She was sucked into oblivion

 

2 guys are standing in a bar, and then one of them turnes into a giant shark! He starts to eat people and it becomes one big blood bath! Women children, and a bus full of nuns who where just having a drink...

Any way.. the first guy, I believe his name was Fred, looks at all this and then takes a dead mouse out of his pocket, and whit that he beats the barman until he is dead. And you know what he says then?

"Would you like to have fries with that?"

 

Rags - stop tormenting me.

SleepleSS - what the hell??!

 

A one armed Blonde is climbing a tree, how do you make her fall?

Wave at her!

 

I like this site for jokes.
http://www.aarons-jokes.com/

 

The word good has many meanings. For example, if a man were to shoot his grandmother at a range of five hundred yards, I should call him a good shot, but not necessarily a good man

 

What do you call a fish with no eyes??

A fsh!!