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Slightly different Burns poem

Discussion in 'Creativity Surge' started by The Kilted Crusader, Jan 29, 2005.

  1. The Kilted Crusader

    The Kilted Crusader The Famous Last words "Hey guys, watch THIS!" Veteran

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    I got this in an e-mail from my Dad, and I thought I'd share it with y'all ;)

    ne Wee Scottish Farty (Tae A Fart)


    Oh what a sleekit horrible beastie,
    Lurks in yer bellie efter a feastie,
    Just as ye sit doon among yer kin
    There starts to stir an enormous wind.

    The neeps and tatties and mushy peas
    Start working like a gentle breeze
    But soon the pudding wi' the sauncie face
    Will hae ye blawin' a' ower the place

    Nae matter whit the hell ye dae
    a'body's gonnae naw its you
    Even if ye try tae stifle
    it's like a bullet oot a rifle

    Hawd yer bum ticht tae the chair
    Tae try tae stop the leakin' air
    Shift yersel fae cheek tae cheek
    Pray tae god it disnae reek

    But a' the efforts go asunder
    Oot it comes like a clap o' thunder
    Ricochets arrond the room
    Michty me! a sonic boom

    God almighty it fairly reeks
    A' hope a' huvnae **** ma breeks
    Tae the bog a' better scurry
    Whit the hell, it's no ma worry

    A'body roon aboot me choakin'
    One or two are nearly boakin'
    I'll feel better for a while
    Cannae help but raise a smile

    It wis him! I shout and glower
    Alas too late, he's just keeled ower
    Ye dirty bugger! They shout and stare
    I'm no that welcome any mair

    Where e're ye go let yer wind gang free
    That sounds jist the joab fir me
    Whit a fuss at Rabbie's party
    Ower the sake o' one wee farty

    [ January 30, 2005, 16:45: Message edited by: Taluntain ]
     
  2. Takara

    Takara My goodness! I see turnips everywhere

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    lmao. Kilty, I take it this poem is about you yes? talking about yourself in 3rd person and all that. :p

    Still, very funny.
     
  3. el timtor Gems: 13/31
    Latest gem: Ziose


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    :D

    Love it...
    Gotta show this to one of my bosses. He's Irish, but I figure he'll enjoy it anyway.
     
  4. Smyther Gems: 3/31
    Latest gem: Lynx Eye


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    Ach, mercy me. 'Tis quite perturbin' when ye ken what yon poem's aboot, an' even moreso when ye ken the humor o' it all an' laugh 'till ye crap yer breeks. A bonny ditty it would be to be sung, an dear Robbie would be proud o' the way it's gonna circle like one o' his famed winds on the innernet. Ah'll send it to all an' sundry!
     
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