Warnings for Morons

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Question: When did America become a nation of morons? I found the following warning labels on various packages in my house. I've just got to know, are people really this stupid?

On a bag of Peanuts: "Caution: Contains Nuts."
On a TV Dinner: "Warning: Will be hot after cooking."
On a Television Set: "Not meant for human consumption."
On Coffee Package: "Do not use if you are going to bed."

 

Rastor, have you been reading the recent Pickles?

(In case you people have no idea what I'm talking about, Pickles is a comic strip about old people, and recent strips have involved such "warnings".)

 

Yes, but then I saw identical warnings on some of my own consumer goods, so decided to make a thread out of it. These are all off of my own products.

 

That, is some really scary stuff. Do those products really have those types of warnings (maybe it's an anti-lawsuit campaign by companies?) Either way that's really scary that those types of labels even exist.

 

I think that this is just the result of companies covering their @sses, as it were, in the wake of lawsuits. Which are, at times, stupider than the resultant warnings... but nonetheless prompt or force makers and sellers of goods to explicitly 'warn' of (e.g.) nuts containing nuts.

The next thing we'll see, I'll wager, are lawsuits claiming that the warnings issued ARE NOT BIG ENOUGH, resulting in a federal mandate for font-size relative to other type on the package. Within ten years, "WARNING, CONTAINS NUTS" will be a message printed almost as big as the product name.

The last word will come with stores making agreements with the manufacturers of the goods they carry to get customers to acknowledge certain things. Before allowing anyone to buy, in other words, one will have to sign a form with the notice: "Neither we, nor the makers of wares offered here, will be held responsible for the foolish or thoughtless things you DO with them." I.e. sticking them up your nose or eating them if you are allergic, etc...

 

@Rastor - America habe always been a nation of morons...

no really i often takes coffeine-pills here in sweden and it have the same label as the american coffe...

See Ya

 

I think "Nation of Morons" is inaccurate.

I would go for the title "Nation of People Out to Make a Quick Buck by Filing a Stupid Lawsuit."

My mother used to work at a corporate law firm. One day she came home and told us about a family who was suing companies after the recent suicide of the patriarch of the clan. Apparently, he dumped gasoline on himself and lit his cigarette lighter. The family was suing the gas company, Bic (the lighter company), the company that made the suit that he was wearing, and the company that made the shoes he was wearing.

I don't know about you, but if my spouse/parent died tragically like that, I would be in too great of a state of sorrow to worry about getting a few thousand dollars out of "Bic."

Ah, the greed...

 

Well, America's huge, and correspondingly, there should be a larger proportion of "morons".

But that's not the point though, because...

But like others, I think the main reason is to protect against lawsuits. One woman at McDonald's sued because coffee burned her lips while another sued the same food chain because she slipped on the floor and "broke" her arm. Although she was seen days later at Disneyland using one arm to carry something and the other to open her car.

Oh, well, that's the negative side of semi-pure capitalism,...

 

America is NOT a place of morons, just individual morons that find holes in the law system provoking such rediculous labels. Most americans are just fine, but since they are, they're not as special as the morons and thus dont get highlighted. Just my average common sense naighbor doesn't get highlighted, but the village idiot do.

[ November 17, 2002, 12:35: Message edited by: Lokken ]

 

Actually, a bag of peanuts doesnt really include nuts. The peanut is a bean, not a nut, therefore the warning is false. Perhaps there could be leftovers from other nuts in the package.

 

In a land where everyone is suing everyone, it's only normal to put these kind of things on your products. At least now they are warned IF they manage to get burned while cooking a TV dinner.

 

I saw on a packet that on the bottom it said do not turn upside doan - a bit late. and a plastic bag had 'this bag is for containing items purchased at <shop>. This bag is not for human consumption'

 

IIRC britain isn't much better: I bought a bottle of water there, and oh surprise, I found the label NO FAT!

Water with fat in it would be more some kind of .... soup?!

 

You'll find warnings in the manuals of Porsche cars as well: Only for experienced drivers!

 

I posted a number of warnings in another thread that came on my new oven. My favorite was: "don't use the open oven door as a stepstool". Another one I just noticed today was on a box of table salt: "Of course we are in the business of selling salt, but out of concern for your health, we ask that you intake our product in moderation!" What do they think, someone will sue them for their high blood pressure?

 

the thing i said of the american and capitalism was ment to a joke... i have my own ideas but talking about them here would be a little bit offtopic...

See Ya

[ November 17, 2002, 18:50: Message edited by: AssWooper the ÜberSpammer ]

 

With the exception of the peanuts one, those are pretty stupid. joacqin's right, generally that warning means that there are traces of nuts in the food, something not implied by the presence of peanuts (a legume). Otherwise someone who slips into anaphylactic shock upon eating nuts (e.g. me) would not realize they can't eat these peanuts. This could be a fatal oversight and grounds for (shock of shocks!) a legitimate lawsuit.

[ November 17, 2002, 19:22: Message edited by: The Deviant Mage ]

 

I'm with Falstaff.

It's our laws. It's our politicians and Judicial system.

That's the problem. That's the answer. Fix the problem, and you have the answer.

Wasn't it Jefferson who said there needs to be a revolution ever 200 years?

 

*Looks at another thread where someone whines about a non-existent McDonald's suit where a woman burnt her lips (unless he means another sort of lips), wonders at the lack of foundation here, and gives up. Wandering away.

 

I'm unsure if those notices are because of lawsuits. I believe that such lawsuits would look like this (true story):


Attorney: So, doctor, you determined that a gunshot wound was the cause of death of the patient?

Doctor: That's correct.

Attorney: Did you examine the patient when he came to the emergency room?

Doctor: No, I performed the autopsy.

Attorney: Okay, were you aware of his vital signs while he was at the hospital?

Doctor: Yes, he came in to the emergency room in shock and died in the emergency room a short time after arriving.

Attorney: Did you pronounce him dead at that time?

Doctor: No, I am the pathologist who performed the autopsy. I was not involved with the patient initially.

Attorney: Well, are you even sure, then, that he died in the emergency room?

Doctor: That is what the records indicate.

Attorney: But if you weren't there, how could you have pronounced him dead, having not seen or physically examined the patient at that time?

Doctor: The autopsy showed massive hemorrhage into the chest, and that was the cause of death.

Attorney: I understand that, but you were not actually present to examine the patient and pronounce him dead, isn't that right?

Doctor: No, sir, I did not see the patient or actually pronounce him dead, but I did perform an autopsy and right now his brain is in a jar over at the county morgue. As for the rest of the patient, for all I know he could be out practicing law somewhere.

---------------------------------------------

This is taken from: http://www.laurasmidiheaven.com/card/pages/lawyerandpathologist.shtml

Now tell me if that lawyer doesn't need printed "nuts included" (yes, the trial happened in USA).

[ November 18, 2002, 01:00: Message edited by: Extremist ]