A penny for your thoughts

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Just a little poem I wrote that I would like some feedback on. I hope you'll enjoy it. Please be brutally honest.

Depression

Spinning and convulsing like the contours of my mind,
Within, no sane or reasoning thought can I too easily find,
I stand a witness to my own detention so sublime,
For only in my now caged wits can I in refuge pine,

It stands to reason why I would so easily concede,
And fall into this dismal trap, my progress to impede,
That I would to this dreary temple give my tender head,
As if to say in no sure terms, to me I’m already dead,

But to this answer I think I have now become too numb,
Words cannot express the voiceless pleading of the dumb,
I simply need a respite from vindictive reasoning’s care,
I need to be myself, not just a pawn or changing ware,

So to this world of ardent thought I bid a fond adieu,
There isn’t now much else in this cruel place to see me through,
But if I can, I hope to leave this detrimental state,
And pray that to this cruel façade I’ll ner more penetrate,

For this doleful state which now I willingly embrace,
Is the real true masquerade, which banes the human race,
And though at some small point all through this veil will probably go,
If we fight the bitter end, our joy can ever flow,

 

You wanted brutally honest: there you go!
I compliment you on your posting of a poem that rhymes (which has become pretty rare in modern poetry)... Still, I find there are some clumsy places style-wise, for example :

I also think there are is a little excess of inversions like :

Apart from the form, the contents in itself is interesting since the important thing is that it reflects your personal vision of things rather than the imitation of someone else's, and I assure you that the reader can sense throughout your poem that it's meaning is very personal.

Now please understand that my (very mild) criticism is not dericted to you as a person but to the poem in itself. I know all this may sound very pretentious so I must explain myself.
I am not giving out advice from the position of someone who is your better in any way and I am in no way saying that I can write any better. When I give advice to fellow wannabee poets, I am mostly repeating advice I have already heard thousands of times and that has proven usefull to me.
I know how hard it is to hear your work criticized since I have mine read out by different people all the time, and I know that it's far from pleasant. Still, later on, I find that criticizm is never an idle remark but always contributes to making my stuff better...
I sincerely hope you will agree with me.

Finally, I allow myself to give you one last tip, the one I recently discovered from the correspondence of the wonderfull poet and authour that was Rilke (whom I strongly recommend): Paint your sadness and your desires, your passing thoughts and the faith in some beauty; paint all of that with an ardent, silent, humble sincerity.

I hope you may use any of that to improve your work (there are no limits to perfection) .