A poemy poem

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The Rim of Earth
(note: I sure hope this is formatted right)


When the crests of the painless moon
had risen upon their black hue
I found my eyes acrid, pierced,
my flesh cold and blue.
My heart was a frozen stone and
was trapped sobbing inside -
A battle of eagle and serpent
beneath the terrible skies.

Sitting up on the Rim of Earth, I cried,
Pain an icy, creeping vine
I had found this place as a child,
full of riches, treasures all mine
But now it belonged to the angels and devils
I had sought and loved before,
Although I had never known, I knew now
That the Rim of Earth was poor.

A tumultuous roar pierced the veins of Night,
and I shivered against the fear -
Perhaps the demons and the angels
Were coming, growing near?
No - no, this had been surmised -
I expected my old companions to show,
I had thought and known and compelled my mind,
to believe, to anticipate a bleary woe.

But as the twisted dead trees unraveled their maze
to, perhaps, reveal what I had awaited -
Instead outstepped a wondrous and striking haze,
An insubstantial presence with alignment abated,
A synergy of galaxies, a comprehension of this world,
Whereupon the visage, my frozen eyes began to thaw
Whereupon the understanding - the knowledge there curled
I stood unfrightened, as truth’s power was here - raw.

This visage I saw was white, as white as the purest snow;
my eyes turned brighter with the sight of wings,
Golden entwined with glory and pain, all things high or low,
I had thought before there were demons indeed,
But there was proof - a whisper of absolutes unneeded
For the treasures all mine are mine today again,
No angels plague a morality; no demons here are seated.

 

Uh...any changes you want? Continuations?

 

I don't know poetry, but I know what I like, and what I like is that

 

Good job Xealifer, it's a good poet... especially the first 2 parts are great.... That's all I say.... I won't try to correct someone in things where he is more skillful then me.

 

Next I will write a poem about the accordion. Take that, Frost.