Am I ugly, or just paranoid?

Remove all ads!

Ok.

So far, no mirrors broken.

People don't feel nauseated for looking at my face.

Kids don't point their fingers and laugh at me, when I pass them by.

But what if I'm just ugly enough that it doesn't actually show, but it will affect people's judgment on me in a way that they can't quite trust me, or that what ever I say or do, they find it amusing.

Of course they couldn't quite point this out, since they probably don't even know that my original looks make them feel the way they do. And of course this whole topic is so stupid that if I ever ask this from someone I know, they can't say anything about it or they'll just burst out laughing.

So how can I tell? Without posting my picture anywhere or making a donkey out of myself anywhere else than in SP, that is.

And has anyone else had these kinds of problems?

 

Pics. Now. I posted a pic of myself posing as Aarin Gend and made a donkey out of myself, but it was all in good fun.

No, I have not had this kind of problem. Also, you could check your charisma stat on your character sheet

 

Yeah, that might be it, but I was actually hoping that some sagely people of the SP in their infinite wisdom would just point me out that I'm hideously deformed.

Augh! I'm a bard with a Char stat of 10! The cruelty! Not bad looking, but not good looking enough to hide my oafish manners!

Edit: And no pictures; technical difficulties, you see.

 

Iku-Turso, without seeing a good picture of you I can't really judge. Based on what you have posted my guess is that you are of average looks, neither stunningly handsome or revoltingly ugly.

Does that help any?

 

I agree with Nakia. If you were ugly, you would know. You are probably just paranoid

 

Post your pic and we will know. Since nobody knows you here, it wouldnt matter. Even if someone knew you (although then they would probably already know how you looked like) or lived near you, it still wouldnt matter. The fact that they frequent these boards (how else would they see the picture) must tell you something (that they, to some extent, can be mocked for being nerds, which in turn takes away their right to tease other people)

 

I don't know about ugly, but you seem extremely insecure - which is worse.

 

I can't judge your looks without seeing your picture. I will spare you the looks aren't everything crap (although it's actually true in a large part), I won't tell you that "oh, no, you certainly must be handsome" or assume that you're ugly just because you think you are.

You can't be that awful if kids don't make fun of you, though. If you were really ugly, they would make fun of you, not only kids, and you would certainly have caught at least a couple of people talking behind your back or even reacting to your appearance with a grimace. So it can't be *that* bad. And if it isn't *that* bad, crap, you can leave with it. Even if it happens to be below average on the beauty scale. Besides, people have different ideas of beauty, so what some like others hate. There are women who think I'm hideous and there are women who think I'm gorgeous and heck, even I can't decide sometimes. There are various ways to make up for lack of exceptional looks and not all are surgical. Plus, perhaps it's exaggerated, anyway. Sometimes people think they're ugly while the rest of the world thinks they're pretty.

In the looks area, you can achieve a lot by just paying attention to your hygiene, how you dress, shaving or trimming your facial hair neatly, combing your hair and keeping it in shape, keeping yourself in shape, in general. Working out if you like the idea. Or choosing the right hair and clothing style if you're a girl (Okay, I do know you're a guy. ). Come on, no one is really ugly if he's well groomed and carefully dressed.

Plus, kindness and politeness is more important than just looking good. I even think it has a bigger effect on people's reaction, at least if you're male.

[ January 23, 2006, 22:21: Message edited by: chevalier ]

 

Beauty is most definitely in the eye of the beholder. (That's the person who is looking at you, not some ultra-scary thing with eyes on tentacles that shoot beams at you.)

I bet you're not ugly, but only because hardly any one is really. Think about all your friend's parents. I bet they're not all super-models but they have still managed to get married and have families and be reasonably successful in life. That's the evidence you need to stop worrying about what you look like and start following chevalier's advice instead (did I really just say that?)

 

Yep, you're ugly.

 

I agree with Pac man.

Without seeing a picture of you to prove that you actually *are* ugly, I'm just going to have to go with my gut feeling that you are in fact, ugly.

Prove me wrong...

Dude, you're not living in the 1920's...kids now-in-days take a descrete photo of you on their cell phone and then go home and write a blog about your uglyness on the net.

 

Are you posting this topic because you are interested in a particular person in more than a "just friends" sort of way and are worried that they don't find you attractive?

Chemistry is the key. If there is no chemistry then you could be Antonio Banderas and still not get affection from the one you desire. (Yah I know he's with Melanie Griffith but that is beside the point.) Likewise I've met many people who may not look nice in a picture but when met in person have charisma out the yinyang that more than makes up for a crooked nose of an uneven eyebrow.

Love yourself and the rest will follow.

 

Don't worry about it, I wondered this once, and after a minute or two near the mirror I decided that I am gorgeous. I recommend you do the same thing.

 

Oh yeah, insecure, that's me. At least right now, but that's what losing a long-time relationship might do to some people, like me for instance.

I sort of posted this topic so that I'd get few reminders of the things that are important. And for a few laughs as well. Thanks for providing them.

I'm more undecided of my looks than anything and having only lousy pictures of myself doesn't really help.

And I'm not posting those pictures, since they're not that becoming, and I actually don't need an opinion on my looks, at least not right now.

And yes, I am interested in someone, and she wants to see how I look (yes it's an internet thing), and I'm insecure about it. But maybe I'll just stop worrying; if looks are that important to her, well then she's not probably my kind of a person anyways..

 

Well, fear not my friend. Back in Summer 2004 I suddenly became single after a long relationship, and it hit me pretty hard. Needless to say though, looking back, the summer following this break up was one of the best times of my life. You learn who your friends are in that situation, you realise that you don't need to depend on any one person to live, survive or be happy. You remember just how great life is regardless of whether or not you have someone to call your girlfriend/boyfriend.
The insecurity might be an issue, but even if you don't feel confident about your looks, others don't need to know that. Feigned confidence can work just as well as real confidence, and 90% of the time it becomes the real thing anyway. Time heals all, as they say, and until I figure out just how to cast this "Cure Light Wounds" spell, time is what we must rely on. It'll work for you too!

 

Well thank you Sir Farivald, you are most kind and wise. Time has already started to heal my wounds and things are looking better already.

Maybe someday I'll terrify you all with a picture of me, just for the fiendishness of it.

 

Damn, HB beat me to it! i'll rephrase: Beauty is in the eye of the Beerholder then

 

Looks are important to everyone, varying degrees, sure, but they are important. If you're hideously ugly and/or obese, then yeah, no pretty girl in the world is going to want to shag you, end of story, but that's your problem, not theirs. Insecurity is off putting, so don't be insecure. Good confidence and a fun personality will combat poor looks, but there's obviously a line.

 

I feel your pain. Sometimes when I sit in the bus, all the other seats are taken before the one next to me. I know I look nerdy and my skin is far from perfect, so sometimes I think that's the reason. That's partly why I like to get on the bus later where I'm "forced" to sit next to someone instead.

But really, just focus on the good things that happen. Like when a girl looks at you and smiles. Or makes eye contact. Or waves. Sure, it might be because they are too far away to see your ugliness in detail, but their paying you attention still feels good!

 

Allright...here's an image of me...the point is that it's modified, first accidentally, but since it looked cooler this way, I let it be.

And I have an issue with putting my face in the net as it is, so this might be just as good as it gets.



Edit: Special thanks to Jiggajay, for giving me this silly idea in the first place, and for providing imageshack address in his 'do I look like my avatar?' thread.