Chapter 1 - A Deck of Heroes

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I have no aversion to rolling stats. That's one of the main DnD things, right? Rolling random stats. I never thought it translated well in the cRPG system because there's no human element to the game where you can still succeed even without min/maxing everything, but most games that I've played allow you to modify the stats so you don't have to hit the roll button for eternity.

Unfortunately, you cannot modify them once you have rolled in ToEE, so you're forced to roll and re-roll for eternity. There is also an "advanced" tab which starts all your attributes at 8, but doesn't give you enough points to actually make a decent character, and you cannot lower the scores on any stats. Something I've discovered, and I'm sure everyone else has discovered this too, is that you can go to the advanced tab, jack up and attribute, and simply drag it to the right side of the screen where the boxes would be on the "basic" tab. When you switch back to the basic tab the score is there waiting happily to be added to your character. If you switch back to the advanced section, the points are refilled, so you can easily create a perfect 18 character. While messing with this I managed to get a character with a 47 to distribute. That's right, a FOURTY SEVEN. That means I could have had a fighter with 47 strength! That's a little too much cheating for me, so I passed. However, the whole roll system is screwed up, and I don't consider rolling for hours to be fun. Besides, the game keeps track on your character sheet of the amount of times you rolled, and I don't want to look like an indecisive prick.

That's stupid. Really, really stupid. Why would anyone want to have the amount of times they hit the roll button displayed forever on their character sheet? So, I used the set points in advanced and drag them to basic to create a balanced character. Otherwise you end up with a character that has slightly above average points in all attributes unless you're willing to dedicate hours to pressing a button. Funny, I had to break the rules to play fair. Wonderful.

My first character: Zelda
Status: Female Human Barbarian
Alignment: Neutral Good
Worships: Kord (God of bravery and swords and... ah, who cares?)
Re-Rolls: 69 (Hilarious!)
Height: 5'1" (Height is one of the most important decisions you will make in the game and affects such things as the distance between your head and the ground)
Attributes:
* STR 18
* DEX 17
* CON 18
* INT 11 (I could have bumped this up for more skill points, but she wasn't going to be dealing with all that extra junk)
* WIS 16 (It's been a good defensive skill in other games)
* CHA 11
Feats:
* Exotic Weapon Proficiency - Spiked Chain (Because I've never played a game that let you use a goddamn spiked chain!)
* Dodge (The only other one that I knew would always be useful)
Skills:
* Intimidate - 4
* Listen - 4
* Spot - 2
* Search - 2
* Tumble - 2

From playing through a little my biggest problem was enemies jumping out of bushes or swamps and killing me before I could react, so hopefully Listen, Spot, and Search can take care of that... stupidly divided up into three separate skills for some reason.

Character number deux: Finn
Status: Male Human Rogue
Alignment: Lawful Good (How ironic!)
Worships: Farlanghn (Apparently lawful good rogues have only one choice of god to worship - the god of quarter staves)
Re-Rolls: 0 (He was born awesome)
Height: 5'8"
Attributes:
* STR 15
* DEX 18
* CON 16
* INT 18 (I needed the skill points)
* WIS 16
* CHA 9
Feats:
* Dodge
* Martial Weapon Proficiency - Longbows
Skills:
* Bluff - 4
* Concentration - 2
* Disable Device - 4
* Heal - 2
* Intimidate - 4
* Listen - 4
* Move Silently - 4
* Open Lock - 4
* Search - 4
* Sleight of Hand - 4
* Spot - 4
* Tumble - 4
* Use Magic Device - 4

I am not making this up... bumping your INT practically makes you a skill GOD.

The third character: Benihana
Status: Male Dwarf Wizard (Take that, society, and your adventuring norms)
Alignment: Chaotic Good (So good he's crazy!)
Worships: Boccob
Re-Rolls: 1 (Almost born awesome)
Height: 4'2"
Attributes:
* STR 16
* DEX 17
* CON 18 +2 (Race modifier)
* INT 18
* WIS 18
* CHA 10 -2 (Race modifier)
Feats:
* Combat Casting (Because maybe, just maybe, I might cast a spell or two in combat)
Skills:
* Concentration - 4
* Spellcraft - 4
* Use Magic Device - 2 (Oddly enough, wizard's aren't adept at using magic items in this game)
* Bluff - 2
* Tumble - 2
* Heal - 2
Specialization: Evocation
Forbidden Spells:
* Abjuration (Detect evil and protection from good spells... let me think... NOPE)
* Conjuration (No odd path finding issues for me, thank you very much, and I can do without GREASE LIGHTING)
Spells:
* Burning Hands
* Magic Missile (Always a good spell to fall back on)
* Sleep
* Reduce Person (The favored spell of bullies everywhere)
* Identify (Having to pay for this kills your wallet, in my experience, so getting it for free is new and possibly game breaking, and by "free" I mean you have access to all spells at all times so there's no need to make tough decisions like which select ones you have immediate access to)
* Detect Secret Doors (Would have been helpful in Zelda)

It seems that INT only makes you a skill god if you’re a rogue. Apparently, wizards get no point love.

Now, I know I said before that it's pointless to play a wizard instead of a sorcerer, but I didn't have enough CHA to be a sorcerer and I am already stretching the cheat limit as it is for attribute points.

The game starts and I'm walking along in a city somewhere with my fully armed band of brothers when we hear a scream and... yada yada yada. Who cares? Some priestess got whacked and now we're off to deliver the news to the Church in Hommlet, out of the kindness of our hearts, I guess.

My impressions so far? The dwarf looks funny in wizard clothes. Ha. The graphics are really, really nice. I mean NICE. This might be the best 2D I've ever seen. The characters themselves are in 3D, but that's easily forgiven seeing as how nice the backgrounds look. The music is soothing, but the voice acting isn't very good, however it's not game breaking unlike most other badly voiced games. I'm enjoying it so far. I'm immersed. I've forgotten about the numerous times I've restarted this damn thing.

In Hommlet I walk around looking for a guard and run into a guy named Elmo, the town drunk. This guy is an awesome fighter. Really. He's also great because he's one of the few party members who has a specific "want". From reading and experience each recruit-able NPC, unlike other games, takes loot for themselves and won't work for free. Elmo takes a share of the money. A few other guys have their own thing (like a wizard who only wants scrolls), but most just take half of EVERYTHING.

Having NPCs take loot for themselves and keep it is a great concept, but falls flat because you cannot negotiate with them further. Sure, that magic war hammer you found in a box might be crucial to your party's survival, but if you cannot take it from the rogue and give it to the fighter, then it's useless and you're screwed. Maybe you do need that one scroll, but the wizard guy took it and will not give it up unless you kill him. It also falls flat because, as I said, most just take half of everything regardless of what the item is.

Elmo does not fall into any of these pitfalls because he only takes money. However, I won't be picking him up right now because he's just too powerful, and I need all the EXP and cash I can get for my current three characters to grow and prosper. I was able to ask him about the church and its location. Okay, so far so good. A pretty simple start but it works. On the way there I stop and talk with a guard who confirms the location of the temple. He's part of some group called the Badgers, former bandits who turned good under a leader named Burne. I’ll have to visit this Burne later to see if the game wants me to slaughter him or join him.

Continuing on... Hommlet seems barren. Now, it is one of the better towns in any video game because of its size and layout. It looks like somewhere people might actually live. However, there's just no people walking around! Everyone's cooped up in their houses, which is weird because they don’t seem like Puritans when you talk to them. I’d love to see an RPG town where no one is walking on the streets because the people really are xenophobes. Crazy explanations for silly game play limitations are something I enjoy. I’m guessing everyone is in their houses because if they all step outside then time will slow down to a crawl and possibly cause the universe to implode. Get it? God forgot to optimize his world engine!