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For everyone who HATES chainletters...

Discussion in 'Whatnots' started by Gash, Jul 14, 2001.

  1. Gash Gems: 14/31
    Latest gem: Chrysoberyl


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    Here's something I cooked up;

    There are 4 types of chain letter:

    Chain Letter Type 1 - Make a wish

    Wasn't that fun? Hope you made a great wish. Now, to make you feel guilty,
    here's what I'll do. First of all, if you don't send this to a certain
    number of people in the next 5 seconds, you will be raped by a mad goat and
    then thrown off a high building into a pile of manure. It's true! Because,
    you know, THIS letter isn't like all of those fake ones, THIS one is TRUE!!

    Really!!! Here's how it goes.

    Send this to 1 person: One person will be pissed off at you for sending them
    a stupid chain letter.

    Send this to 2-5 people: 2-5 people will be pissed off at you for sending
    them a stupid chain letter.

    5-10 people: 5-10 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a stupid
    chain letter.

    10-20 people: 10-20 people will be pissed off at you for sending them a
    stupid chain letter.

    20 to 674, 951 1/2 people: 20 to 674, 951 1/2 people will be pissed off at
    you for sending them a stupid chain letter.

    Thanks!!!! Good Luck!!!
    --------------------------------------------

    Chain Letter Type 2

    Hello, and thank you for reading this letter. You see, there is a starving
    little boy in Baklaliviatatlaglooshen who has no arms, no legs, no parents,
    and no willie. This little boy's life could be saved, because for every time
    you pass this on, a dollar will be donated to the Little Starving Legless
    Armless Willieless Boy from Baklaliviatatlaglooshen Fund. Remember, we have no way of counting letters sent and this is all bullshit. So go on, reach out. Send this to 5 people in the next 47 seconds. Oh, and a reminder- if
    you accidentally send this to 4 or 6 people, you will die instantly. Thanks again!!
    ---------------------------------------------

    Chain Letter Type 3

    Hi there!! This chain letter has been in existence since 1897. This is
    absolutely incredible becuase there was no email then and probably not as
    many bitchy little 8 year olds writing chain letters. So this is how it
    works. Pass this on to 1-5067 people in the next 7 minutes or something
    horrible will happen to you like:

    Queer Horror Story #1

    Miranda Pinsley was walking home from school on Saturday. She had recently
    recieved this letter and ignored it. She then tripped in a crack in the
    sidewalk, fell into the sewer, was gushed down a drainpipe in a flood of
    shit, and went flying out over a waterfall. Not only did she smell nasty,
    she died.This Could Happen To You!!!

    Queer Horror Story #2

    Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a chain letter in his mail and ignored
    it. Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his boyfriend (hey, some
    people swing that way). They both died and went to hell. They continued to
    suffer in hell where they were both cursed to eat adorable kittens every day
    for eternity. This Could Happen To You!!!

    Remember, you could end up like Pinsley and Bip did. Just send this letter
    to all of your loser friends, and everything will be Ok.
    ---------------------------------------------

    Chain Letter Type 4:

    As if you care, here is a poem that I wrote. Send it to every one of your friends.

    Friends
    A friend is someone who is always at your side,
    A friend is someone who likes you even though you smell like shit,
    A friend is someone who likes you even though you're disgustingly ugly,
    A friend is someone who cleans up for you after you've soiled yourself,
    A friend is someone who stays with you all night while you cry about your
    loser life,
    A friend is someone who pretends they like you when they really think you
    should be raped by a mad goat and then thrown to vicious dogs,
    A friend is someone who scrubs your toilet and vacuums and then gets the check and leaves and doesn't speak much English, no sorry that's the
    cleaning lady,
    A friend is not someone who sends you shitty chain letters because he wants
    his wish of his crush sucking his schlong him to come true.
    Now pass this on! If you don't, Satan will screw you in your sleep!!
    ---------------------------------------------

    Do yourself a favor, and everyone else in the world, and say
    ?#$@!%#^! CHAIN LETTERS!!?
     
  2. Zaragoth Guest

    /me slaps Chainletters around with a large trout!
     
  3. Vicsun Gems: 9/31
    Latest gem: Iol


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    [​IMG] You ruined my cheery day! :( Why oh why did you do it? I bet it was on purpose. I hope that:

    1. You will be raped by a mad goat and
    then thrown off a high building into a pile of manure.

    2. You will be walking home from school on Saturday. you had recently
    recieved this post and ignored it. You then tripped in a crack in the
    sidewalk, fell into the sewer, got gushed down a drainpipe in a flood of
    shit, and went flying out over a waterfall. Not only will you smell nasty,
    you will die.This Will Happen To You!!!

    I won't even bother editing this:
    3. Dexter Bip, a 13 year old boy, got a chain letter in his mail and ignored
    it. Later that day, he was hit by a car and so was his boyfriend (hey, some
    people swing that way). They both died and went to hell. They continued to
    suffer in hell where they were both cursed to eat adorable kittens every day
    for eternity. This Could Happen To You!!!

    :D
     
  4. Taluntain

    Taluntain Resident Alpha and Omega Staff Member ★ SPS Account Holder Resourceful Adored Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) New Server Contributor [2012] (for helping Sorcerer's Place lease a new, more powerful server!) Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) BoM XenForo Migration Contributor [2015] (for helping support the migration to new forum software!)

    Joined:
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    Talking about chain letters, I got one from herf today. NO MORE, HERF! :mad:

    [This message has been edited by Taluntain (edited July 14, 2001).]
     
  5. Sniper Gems: 28/31
    Latest gem: Star Sapphire


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    [​IMG] ROFLOL!!

    Thats good gash! I got one of those as well!

    And yeah Tal, i got one off herf as well! It was something about jesus and his mates being gay or something in a movie. I absolutely pissed myself with laughter at the thought! :D :D :D
     
  6. Crawl Gems: 23/31
    Latest gem: Black Opal


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    Good grief, Charlie Brown. Glad I don't give out my email that often. But I did get a chain letter not that long ago and sent it, and promptly got an email back saying that make a wish doesn't support chain letters. Made me feel like an ass, so I forwarded that email to the person who sent me the stupid chain letter in the first place :D By the way, that was some of the funniest stuff I've read in a while. Though he seems to be obsessed with feces and Satan screwing people, don't you think ;)
     
  7. Gash Gems: 14/31
    Latest gem: Chrysoberyl


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    *Diamond Cutters Crawl*
     
  8. Shadowcouncil Gems: 29/31
    Latest gem: Glittering Beljuril


    Veteran

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    lol :)
     
  9. Septic Yogurt Gems: 9/31
    Latest gem: Iol


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    Herf: read this.
     
  10. Crawl Gems: 23/31
    Latest gem: Black Opal


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    *laid out on the canvas having horrible visions of a Booker T v/s Buff Bagwell main event* Heh, I was just kidding Hools. Nothing personal, you know ;)
     
  11. herf Guest

    sorry tal and sniper i didnt realise i had sent it to you, considering its the first one ive sent i dont think i done too bad, i just chose the option "default list of everyone" and i forgot that u 2 were on it.

    u must admit tho, it was funny as hell!
     
  12. Gash Gems: 14/31
    Latest gem: Chrysoberyl


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    LOL @ Crawl ;) I know buddy just coz WCW is better :D
     
  13. Sniper Gems: 28/31
    Latest gem: Star Sapphire


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    [​IMG] Its kewl herf...just remember that i might decide to send my thanks in the form of another chainletter to you ;)
     
  14. Gormenghast Gems: 10/31
    Latest gem: Zircon


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    Funny Stuff Gash!But sometimes these things really piss me off.
     
  15. Ironbeard Gems: 20/31
    Latest gem: Garnet


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    ROTFL! Oh, that is so funny I have to spread the word! Hey, Gash, can I copy and post this onto another board or post a link? You get full credit of course!
    *| | THANKS!!!!
    *| |
    *| |
    \| |/
    *\/


    [This message has been edited by Ironbeard (edited July 17, 2001).]

    [This message has been edited by Ironbeard (edited July 17, 2001).]

    [This message has been edited by Ironbeard (edited July 17, 2001).]
     
  16. Zaragoth Guest

    [​IMG] Today I got a chainletter that said that if I din´t send it on, my walls would fall in. I did not send it, and my walls are still there...
     
  17. Wildfire Gems: 23/31
    Latest gem: Black Opal


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    [​IMG] LOL! Today I got a chain letter claiming that Microsoft would start charging for MSN if I didn't send that mail to 10 more people within the hour :D :D :D.
     
  18. Gash Gems: 14/31
    Latest gem: Chrysoberyl


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    Sure Ironbeard
     
  19. Sniper Gems: 28/31
    Latest gem: Star Sapphire


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    whats the point ironbeard?
     
  20. ClammyRyu Gems: 3/31
    Latest gem: Lynx Eye


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    [​IMG] Today I got a chainletter that said if I don't send it, A ghost would find my way onto my computer. It came with pictures and scared the S#$t out of me!!!!!! It had wird pics of a japanese ghost and said if I don't send this to 20 friends, somehting would happen. :(
     
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