Gag gifts

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My mother's birthday is on the 22nd, and she will turn 51. I got her a nice woollen scarf for a "proper" gift, ansd then there is, of course, the....

Gag gift.

THis is the first time I have gotten one, but it is worth it, for I could not tresist the temptation... I got her a black see-though thong with red flower-prints and sequins

Guess which one I am going to give her first?

So, what are the coolest gag gifts you have given to people or been given yourself?

(Who, me, going to be killed? Yep...)

 

I was once going to give someone the three Conphucius's monkeys - one doesn't look, one doesn't listen and one doesn't speak. On second thought I decided not to do and they're now standing on a bookshelf.

 

15 Euros for a shag with a big fat black woman. (The person in question was complaining it was a long time he had sex ) He never put the money to the intended purpose though

Also, I once got a make-up set for my birthday from three of my friends. I've had it lying around for three years, until I gave half of it away to a female friend, and tossed the other not used half away.

I also once gave a friend of mine a couch. A two-sitter. Somebody did it away because a cat had urinated over it. It smelled awful. So we bought three cannisters of bathroom freshener and bathed the couch in it. When he got it, it smelled minty fresh, but we then came to the conclusion he didn't have any room for the couch.

 

One word: Buttplug.

Nuff' said.

 

The musical loo roll holder.

The World's worst waste of plastic. Frighteningly annoying and totally deadly in the wrong hands.

For my friends 18th i thought it would be good to get him all the things that you have ID for.
A porn mag, A porn movie, A sexkey ID number, a bottle of Whiskey, a pack of cigs, Two condoms (i used one out of the pack) and a BB gun.

A Brilliant Idea, till he opened it in front of his parents....I think his dad was more impressed than he was..

 

The worst we ever received was a cat-treat jar (like a cookie jar) that meowed when you opened the lid. Even worse, it wasn't meant as a gag gift.

The best gag gift we ever gave was when we contributed a package of rainbow-colored condoms to a Chinese auction gift exchange.

 

I gave one of my old friends a box of 1/4" diameter condoms I got at Spencer's Gifts.
I also gave him a card that had a really cute chick with huge breasts wearing a skimpy bikini on the front cover, and when you open the card, you find that she's a trasvestite.

 

I gave my Dad a jumping bum

It was a little wind up toy bum with legs that hopped around

 

I gave my best chick friend a set of jiggle balls, and a stress relieving penis (as in, a penis shaped stress reliever, that you squeeze when stressed). But they were her actual gifts, not gag gifts, coz she's dirty.

 

Three years ago my best friend and I bought a goat and secretly put it in the garden of our other friend who was having his birthday the next day. Imagine his surprise when he saw a goat standing in his garden, we actually told him recently that we put that goat in his garden, he thought it was pretty funny, his parents did not

 

I once bought a friend a cucumber and some vaseline.....