Man-Eating Badgers?

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Is this a serious news article?

I can't even do it justice - reports in Iraq that British troops have released "strange man-eating, bear-like beasts into the area to sow panic"

How can they be serious?

EDIT: OK, the link is working now. Text is below.

[ August 09, 2007, 21:15: Message edited by: Aldeth the Foppish Idiot ]

 

I'm with you, Aldeth, this sounds like a joke of some sort. However, the world is a strange place and one never really knows. If it is true, then in a sense the British are using biological warfare -- maybe even genetically engineered organisms that are striking fear into the hearts of the populace as we speak!

 

I saw that story in a couple of the local papers while I was over working in London so I can confirm that it did receive fairly wide coverage there. Of course everyone I heard discussing the story thought it was pretty funny and didn't take it at all seriously. I saw similar coverage for all kinds of stupid stories over there.

 

Heh, whoever the author is, they sure have a taste for alliteration. Apart from that, it sounds almost too insane to even take seriously. Apparently Iraq is not without its share of conspiracy theorists. Swift as a dear, size of a dog, head of a monkey - surely a demon the infidels have brought with them!

 

My favorite part is the military spokesman: "We can categorically state that we have not released man-eating badgers into the area. " I mean, it's funny just to read such a quote. As if the British army could possibly even be in possession of "man-eating badgers".

 

What amuses me about the wording is that by sticking the man-eating into the denial it isn't a denial of releasing normal badgers into the area.

 

I never did trust the British. How could they keep such a nefarious secret weapon from us? We are supposed to be allies afterall.

 

Hey, friendship always goes only this far between countries. What the nuke was for wars in the 20th century, man-eating badgers will be for the 21st.

Now, if only they had managed to train ninja badgers, they might just make it to superpowerdom again

 

Oh no, someone has guessed our Secret plan

 

Badgers...
Badgers...
Am I missing something here? Are badgers known in the UK and Iraq for vicious attacks on people or something? I mean, we don't get a lot of them around here, but I've never heard of a badger attacking a person. In fact, if one did attack me, I think my first response would be to kick it (with shoes on). My second would probably be to beat it with a large stick. I just keep thinking of the Rodents Of Unusual Size from The Princess Bride. Or maybe the mole-rats from Fallout 2. Unless they carry rabies, I don't think I'd feel terribly threatened by them, especially not in a country like Iraq. I mean, all things considered, if the badgers are the biggest threat on people's minds, we're doing a much better job over there than I thought.
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No mushroom?

Wait till you see the Badger Redcoats hit your shores

 

Well, there is a lake here in Sweden where they are going to shoot off a few beavers who have been attacking swimmers. Maybe an early experiment?

 

No that is actually part of a similar program that has been run for decades by the Canadian military. It is well documented that Canadian beavers caused untold havok in the Soviet Union during the cold war years.

As our troops are not involved in the Iraq campaign there is no risk of our beavers showing up in Iraq and teaming up with the British badgers. However, Afghanistan is another story.

 

I'm sure there must be a UN resolution somewhere banning beavers for military purposes.

 

"If beavers are outlawed, only outlaws will have beavers."

 

ROFLMAO!!!

Rally, I love you.

 

"Badgers? We ain't got no badgers. We don't need no badgers. I don't have to show you any stinking badgers."

 

Perhaps they were dire badgers...