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The Best Bad Quote Game

Discussion in 'Whatnots' started by Death Rabbit, Oct 22, 2003.

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  1. Death Rabbit

    Death Rabbit Straight, no chaser Adored Veteran Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!)

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    Remove all ads!
    Just as the title says. Inspired by the "different kind of quote game" thread, where we list inspirational or meaningful quotes, I thought it would be fun to list out the quotes that are so stupid that upon hearing them you feel like IQ points are actually being sucked right out of your head. :eek:

    Oh...and please keep the George W. Bush quotes to a minimum...this thread could go on forever otherwise. ;)

    The first, and one of my recent favorites...

    "Whenever I watch TV and see those poor starving kids all over the world, I can't help but cry. I mean I'd love to be skinny like that, but not with all those flies and death and stuff."
    --- Mariah Carey
     
    Death Rabbit, Oct 22, 2003
    #1
  2. Hacken Slash

    Hacken Slash OK... can you see me now?

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    The only thing I can think of at this time was a quote that was meant to be funny,

    "Allow myself to introduce myself"
    ---Austin Powers

    So bad it could have been real. It's still early here, I'll think of something better soon.
     
    Hacken Slash, Oct 22, 2003
    #2

  3. Yerril Gems: 22/31
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    My friend has trouble remembering names, and whilst attempting to attract my attention, let fly the following string of names in search of the correct one...

    Perhaps not so funny when viewed out of context, until you realise that the guy's name is Phil.
     
    Yerril, Oct 22, 2003
    #3

  4. Iago Gems: 24/31
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    DR: I think your quote is an urban legend.

    I've turned from a little nice school girl, into this sexy slutty seductress. Britney Spears

    Turned when ?

    Parental Advisory: Explicit Lyrics

    Ah, what I was looking for.
     
    Iago, Oct 22, 2003
    #4

  5. Mystra's Chosen Gems: 22/31
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    Any "politically correct" euphemism like "Handicapable" or something. I don't see anything wrong with "cripple". Why bull**** themselves?
     
    Mystra's Chosen, Oct 22, 2003
    #5

  6. Rastor Gems: 30/31
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    It depends on what your definition of 'is' is
     
    Rastor, Oct 22, 2003
    #6
  7. joacqin

    joacqin Confused Jerk Adored Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!)

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    My friends girlfriend once said this: "No, we dont have AC, we only have airconditioning."

    That was when I started to see her in a different light.
     
    joacqin, Oct 22, 2003
    #7
  8. Hacken Slash

    Hacken Slash OK... can you see me now?

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    Not a quote, but a sign I saw once...

    "U.S. Army - Intelligence"

    I guess that's really an oxymoron, not a bad quote
     
    Hacken Slash, Oct 22, 2003
    #8
  9. BOC

    BOC Let the wild run free Veteran

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    "If they don't have bread, let them eat cake"

    This is what Marie Antoianette replied when she was told that the commoners were starving.
     
    BOC, Oct 23, 2003
    #9

  10. Mystra's Chosen Gems: 22/31
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    Venni, Vetti, Vicci. I came, I saw, I conquered.
    --- Alexander the Great

    It's not really a bad quote, just an ignorant one. Why the hell would you go to a place, see it, and decide to wipe it out?
     
    Mystra's Chosen, Oct 23, 2003
    #10
  11. Hacken Slash

    Hacken Slash OK... can you see me now?

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    Veni, Vidi, Vici (I know that it's spelled wrong, just too lazy to check) was Julius Caesar. The neat thing about being an all-powerful conqueror of the world is that you get to come up with some kind of memorable arrogant phrase like that. Except in his case, it was true.

    Marie Antoinette lost her head over her stupid quote!
     
    Hacken Slash, Oct 23, 2003
    #11
  12. Dice

    Dice ★ SPS Account Holder Adored Veteran

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    I actually liked this movie. Brahm Stokers Dracula with Winona Ryder and Gary Oldman. Unfortunatly there was one screamingly corny line in it during the love seen between Gary and Winona.

    "I love you too much."

    Now I can't explain why this is so corny unless you have seen the movie and remember how he said that line. Sooooo tacky.
     
    Dice, Oct 23, 2003
    #12
  13. Rotku

    Rotku I believe I can fly Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) New Server Contributor [2012] (for helping Sorcerer's Place lease a new, more powerful server!)

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    How about "You have been terminated!" by our favourite actor, you know the one!
     
    Rotku, Oct 23, 2003
    #13
  14. Death Rabbit

    Death Rabbit Straight, no chaser Adored Veteran Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!)

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    Please, you guys - no movie or TV quotes. These are no fun unless somebody said it off the cuff, making themselves look stupid.

    And yes Yago, I concede - funny, that Google thing!

    :D
     
    Death Rabbit, Oct 23, 2003
    #14
  15. Hacken Slash

    Hacken Slash OK... can you see me now?

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    I have to go back to the '88 Presidential campaign when George Bush sr. said with his fist clenched,

    "Read my lips, NO NEW TAXES"

    Well, we got some new taxes and he regretted that statement for the rest of his career.

    Hows that DR? That what you looking for?
    (look out...I'm showing my age)
     
    Hacken Slash, Oct 23, 2003
    #15
  16. Death Rabbit

    Death Rabbit Straight, no chaser Adored Veteran Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!)

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    Perfect, Hack. Celebrities are fair game too, just nothing from a movie. If it was scripted, it doesn't really count.
     
    Death Rabbit, Oct 23, 2003
    #16

  17. Mystra's Chosen Gems: 22/31
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    "Guns don't kill people. People kill people.

    Well, I think there's a more accurate one. "People don't kill people. Maniacs with guns kill people."
     
    Mystra's Chosen, Oct 23, 2003
    #17
  18. The Kilted Crusader

    The Kilted Crusader The Famous Last words "Hey guys, watch THIS!" Veteran

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    Sorry to have to resort to George Bush Jr. but...

    Reporter: "What do you think the British should do about the IRA bombings."

    Bush: "Shoot their planes down." :rolleyes:
     
    The Kilted Crusader, Oct 23, 2003
    #18
  19. Beren

    Beren Lovesick and Lonely Wanderer Staff Member Member of the Week Distinguished Member ★ SPS Account Holder Resourceful Adored Veteran Pillars of Eternity SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!) New Server Contributor [2012] (for helping Sorcerer's Place lease a new, more powerful server!) Torment: Tides of Numenera SP Immortalizer (for helping immortalize Sorcerer's Place in the game!)

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    There's a few rumours flying around in the criminal bar here in Calgary, Alberta.

    A case came up recently, where a guy did something rather disgusting to his (ex) girlfriend while she was asleep. I don't think I can go into details on this board. She wakes up, realizes what just happened, and then promptly beats the crap out of him (good for her on that piont).

    He gets charged with assault. The Crown Prosecutor (I know of him through a friend) cross-examines the guy when he claims that she consented to his behaviour. Basically, the girlfriend was asleep. How could she have consented? The guy says, "She had the smell of consent" And guess what? The guy walks.

    It's become a half-joke/ half statement of shock by now. The guy says the most absurd and ridiculous thing imaginable on the stand, and he still walks. "The smell of consent" is fast becoming a punchline or tagline with the local lawyers.
     
    Beren, Oct 23, 2003
    #19
  20. BOC

    BOC Let the wild run free Veteran

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    "Airplanes are interesting toys but of no military value"
    Marshall Ferdinand Foch

    "We are not retreating, we are advancing in another direction"
    General D. MacArthur
     
    BOC, Oct 23, 2003
    #20
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