Who said that?

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Okay... the point of this topic is that the first poster, in this case, me, presents a quote. If you know where the quote is from, be it a movie, book, tv show, game or whatever, and who said it, you post the answer and then post a quote yourself.

I hope this topic will bring forth really good qyuotes for us all to use... or really bad ones.

I present you the Quote number One:

"It should be obvious. I'm getting a tan."

Ara
(Hopefully not too spammy)

[ August 23, 2002, 14:15: Message edited by: Arabwel ]

 

Right, is it that guy in Costa Del Sol (FF7), Professor Hojo was it?

Quote number 2 (if you don't get this then you are truly dumb):

"Now when it comes to this, you gotta ask yerself, am I going to fire 5 or 6 times?
But this being the Magnum .48, the most powerful handgun in the world, could blow your head clean orf!...
You gotta sked yerself a question...
'Do I feel lucky'?....Well do ya, PUNK?!"

classic

 

Alright!
Clint Eastwood as Dirty Harry. You didn't get the quote exactly right though.
Here is the correct one:
"I know what you're thinking. Did he fire six shots or only five? Well, to tell you the truth, in all this excitement, I've kinda lost track myself. But being as this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful handgun in the world, and would blow your head clean off, you've got to ask yourself one question: 'Do I feel lucky?' Well, do ya punk?"

Here is a quote you might have seen here on Whatnots:
(This might be too hard, especially if you're not living in the US)

Do you have blacks, too?

[ August 23, 2002, 15:22: Message edited by: Earl Grey ]

 

Easy! George W. Bush to some important Brasilian guy...

"Put the bunny back in the box"

Ara
(Hunting down Hojo fanart... darn the stuff is hard to find...)

 

Good one!
I just say this: Dude, never try to rape a bunny! Bad things happen to you.

I'll pass and let someone else take this one.

 

I'm not sure about it but I think it is from Con Air said by Nicholas Cage. I'm not sure of the guy though.

How about this one it's a bit short but still:

"Not until the fat lady sings"

 

That's easy, Will Smith said that in Independance Day, while he gave Jeff Goldblum the cigar.

OK, this one might a bit hard.

"Dear Lord, the gods have been good to me. As an offering, I present these milk and cookies. If you wish me to eat them instead, please give me no sign whatsoever. [brief pause] Thy bidding will be done.[munch munch munch]"

 

I know that I heard it but can't exactly remember where. Perhaps someone else will.

In the meanwhile here is one of my favorite that can prove to be even harder:

"It's my way or... [a small break] Hell it's my way!"

Don't know? Let me help you it's from a game with allot of shooting.

 

------------------
Moral indignation is jealousy with a halo."
- H. G. Wells (1866-1946)
"Glory is fleeting, but obscurity is forever."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
"Victory goes to the player who makes the next-to-last mistake."
- Chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956)
"Don't be so humble - you are not that great."
- Golda Meir (1898-1978) to a visiting diplomat
"His ignorance is encyclopedic"
- Abba Eban (1915-)
"If a man does his best, what else is there?"
- General George S. Patton (1885-1945)
"I can write better than anybody who can write faster, and I can write faster than anybody who can write better."
- A. J. Liebling (1904-1963)
"People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid."
- Soren Aabye Kierkegaard (1813-1855)
"Give me chastity and continence, but not yet."
- Saint Augustine (354-430)
"Not everything that can be counted counts, and not everything that counts can be counted."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"Only two things are infinite, the universe and human stupidity, and I'm not sure about the former."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"A lie gets halfway around the world before the truth has a chance to get its pants on."
- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
"I do not feel obliged to believe that the same God who has endowed us with sense, reason, and intellect has intended us to forgo their use."
- Galileo Galilei
"The artist is nothing without the gift, but the gift is nothing without work."
- Emile Zola (1840-1902)
"This book fills a much-needed gap."
- Moses Hadas (1900-1966) in a review
"The full use of your powers along lines of excellence."
- definition of"happiness" by John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)
"I'm living so far beyond my income that we may almost be said to be living apart."
- e e cummings (1894-1962)
"Give me a museum and I'll fill it."
- Pablo Picasso (1881-1973)
"Assassins!"
- Arturo Toscanini (1867-1957) to his orchestra
"I'll moider da bum."
- Heavyweight boxer Tony Galento, when asked what he thought of William Shakespeare
"In theory, there is no difference between theory and practice. But, in practice, there is."
- Jan L.A. van de Snepscheut
"I find that the harder I work, the more luck I seem to have."
- Thomas Jefferson (1743-1826)
"Each problem that I solved became a rule which served afterwards to solve other problems."
- Rene Descartes (1596-1650), "Discours de la Methode"
"In the End, we will remember not the words of our enemies, but the silence of our friends."
- Martin Luther King Jr. (1929-1968)
"Whether you think that you can, or that you can't, you are usually right."
- Henry Ford (1863-1947)
"Do, or do not. There is no 'try'."
- Yoda ('The Empire Strikes Back')
"The only way to get rid of a temptation is to yield to it."
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"Don't stay in bed, unless you can make money in bed."
- George Burns (1896-1996)
"I don't know why we are here, but I'm pretty sure that it is not in order to enjoy ourselves."
- Ludwig Wittgenstein (1889-1951)
"The use of COBOL cripples the mind; its teaching should, therefore, be regarded as a criminal offense."
- Edsgar Dijkstra
"C makes it easy to shoot yourself in the foot; C++ makes it harder, but when you do, it blows away your whole leg."
- Bjarne Stroustrup
"A mathematician is a device for turning coffee into theorems."
- Paul Erdos
"The only difference between me and a madman is that I'm not mad."
- Salvador Dali (1904-1989)
"If you can't get rid of the skeleton in your closet, you'd best teach it to dance."
- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
"But at my back I always hear Time's winged chariot hurrying near."
- Andrew Marvell (1621-1678)
"Good people do not need laws to tell them to act responsibly, while bad people will find a way around the laws."
- Plato (427-347 B.C.)
"Whenever I climb I am followed by a dog called 'Ego'."
- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)
"We have art to save ourselves from the truth."
- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)
"Never interrupt your enemy when he is making a mistake."
- Napoleon Bonaparte (1769-1821)
"I think 'Hail to the Chief' has a nice ring to it."
- John F. Kennedy (1917-1963) when asked what is his favorite song
"Human history becomes more and more a race between education and catastrophe."
- H. G. Wells (1866-1946)
"Talent does what it can; genius does what it must."
- Edward George Bulwer-Lytton (1803-1873)
"The difference between 'involvement' and 'commitment' is like an eggs-and-ham breakfast: the chicken was 'involved' - the pig was 'committed'."
- unknown
"If you are going through hell, keep going."
- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
"I'm all in favor of keeping dangerous weapons out of the hands of fools. Let's start with typewriters."
- Frank Lloyd Wright (1868-1959)
"Some cause happiness wherever they go; others, whenever they go."
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"God is a comedian playing to an audience too afraid to laugh."
- Voltaire (1694-1778)
"He is one of those people who would be enormously improved by death."
- H. H. Munro (Saki) (1870-1916)
"I am ready to meet my Maker. Whether my Maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter."
- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
"I shall not waste my days in trying to prolong them."
- Ian L. Fleming (1908-1964)
"If you can count your money, you don't have a billion dollars."
- J. Paul Getty (1892-1976)
"Facts are the enemy of truth."
- Don Quixote - "Man of La Mancha"
"When you do the common things in life in an uncommon way, you will command the attention of the world."
- George Washington Carver (1864-1943)
"How wrong it is for a woman to expect the man to build the world she wants, rather than to create it herself."
- Anais Nin (1903-1977)
"I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work."
- Thomas Alva Edison (1847-1931)
"I begin by taking. I shall find scholars later to demonstrate my perfect right."
- Frederick (II) the Great
"Maybe this world is another planet's Hell."
- Aldous Huxley (1894-1963)
"Blessed is the man, who having nothing to say, abstains from giving wordy evidence of the fact."
- George Eliot (1819-1880)
"Once you eliminate the impossible, whatever remains, no matter how improbable, must be the truth."
- Sherlock Holmes (by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle, 1859-1930)
"Black holes are where God divided by zero."
- Steven Wright
"I've had a wonderful time, but this wasn't it."
- Groucho Marx (1895-1977)
"It's kind of fun to do the impossible."
- Walt Disney (1901-1966)
"We didn't lose the game; we just ran out of time."
- Vince Lombardi
"The optimist proclaims that we live in the best of all possible worlds, and the pessimist fears this is true."
- James Branch Cabell
"A friendship founded on business is better than a business founded on friendship."
- John D. Rockefeller (1874-1960)
"All are lunatics, but he who can analyze his delusion is called a philosopher."
- Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914)
"You can only find truth with logic if you have already found truth without it."
- Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936)
"An inconvenience is only an adventure wrongly considered; an adventure is an inconvenience rightly considered."
- Gilbert Keith Chesterton (1874-1936)
"I have come to believe that the whole world is an enigma, a harmless enigma that is made terrible by our own mad attempt to interpret it as though it had an underlying truth."
- Umberto Eco
"Be nice to people on your way up because you meet them on your way down."
- Jimmy Durante
"The true measure of a man is how he treats someone who can do him absolutely no good."
- Samuel Johnson (1709-1784)
"A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both."
- Dwight D. Eisenhower (1890-1969), Inaugural Address, January 20, 1953
"The significant problems we face cannot be solved at the same level of thinking we were at when we created them."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"Basically, I no longer work for anything but the sensation I have while working."
- Albert Giacometti (sculptor)
"All truth passes through three stages. First, it is ridiculed. Second, it is violently opposed. Third, it is accepted as being self-evident."
- Arthur Schopenhauer (1788-1860)
"Many a man's reputation would not know his character if they met on the street."
- Elbert Hubbard (1856-1915)
"There is more stupidity than hydrogen in the universe, and it has a longer shelf life."
- Frank Zappa
"Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away."
- Antoine de Saint Exupery
"Life is pleasant. Death is peaceful. It's the transition that's troublesome."
- Isaac Asimov
"If you want to make an apple pie from scratch, you must first create the universe."
- Carl Sagan
"It is much more comfortable to be mad and know it, than to be sane and have one's doubts."
- G. B. Burgin
"Once is happenstance. Twice is coincidence. Three times is enemy action."
- Auric Goldfinger, in "Goldfinger" by Ian L. Fleming (1908-1964)
"To love oneself is the beginning of a lifelong romance"
- - Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"Knowledge speaks, but wisdom listens."
- Jimi Hendrix
"A clever man commits no minor blunders."
- Goethe (1749-1832)
"Argue for your limitations, and sure enough they're yours."
- Richard Bach
"A witty saying proves nothing."
- Voltaire (1694-1778)
"Education is a progressive discovery of our own ignorance."
- Will Durant
"I have often regretted my speech, never my silence."
- Xenocrates (396-314 B.C.)
"It was the experience of mystery -- even if mixed with fear -- that engendered religion."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"If everything seems under control, you're just not going fast enough."
- Mario Andretti
"I do not consider it an insult, but rather a compliment to be called an agnostic. I do not pretend to know where many ignorant men are sure -- that is all that agnosticism means."
- Clarence Darrow, Scopes trial, 1925.
"Obstacles are those frightful things you see when you take your eyes off your goal."
- Henry Ford (1863-1947)
"I'll sleep when I'm dead."
- Warren Zevon
"There are people in the world so hungry, that God cannot appear to them except in the form of bread."
- Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)
"If you gaze long into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you."
- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)
"The instinct of nearly all societies is to lock up anybody who is truly free. First, society begins by trying to beat you up. If this fails, they try to poison you. If this fails too, the finish by loading honors on your head."
- Jean Cocteau (1889-1963)
"Everyone is a genius at least once a year; a real genius has his original ideas closer together."
- Georg Lichtenberg (1742-1799)
"Success usually comes to those who are too busy to be looking for it"
- Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)
"While we are postponing, life speeds by."
- Seneca (3BC - 65AD)
"Where are we going, and why am I in this handbasket?"
- Bumper Sticker
"God, please save me from your followers!"
- Bumper Sticker
"Fill what's empty, empty what's full, and scratch where it itches."
- the Duchess of Windsor, when asked what is the secret of a long and happy life
"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win."
- Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)
"Luck is the residue of design."
- Branch Rickey - former owner of the Brooklyn Dodger Baseball Team
"Tragedy is when I cut my finger. Comedy is when you walk into an open sewer and die."
- Mel Brooks
"Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do so."
- Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)
"Wit is educated insolence."
- Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)
"My advice to you is get married: if you find a good wife you'll be happy; if not, you'll become a philosopher."
- Socrates (470-399 B.C.)
"Egotist: a person more interested in himself than in me."
- Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914)
"A narcissist is someone better looking than you are."
- Gore Vidal
"Wise men make proverbs, but fools repeat them."
- Samuel Palmer (1805-80)
"It has become appallingly obvious that our technology has exceeded our humanity."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"The secret of success is to know something nobody else knows."
- Aristotle Onassis (1906-1975)
"Sometimes when reading Goethe I have the paralyzing suspicion that he is trying to be funny."
- Guy Davenport
"When you have to kill a man, it costs nothing to be polite."
- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
"Any man who is under 30, and is not a liberal, has not heart; and any man who is over 30, and is not a conservative, has no brains."
- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
"The opposite of a correct statement is a false statement. The opposite of a profound truth may well be another profound truth."
- Niels Bohr (1885-1962)
"We all agree that your theory is crazy, but is it crazy enough?"
- Niels Bohr (1885-1962)
"When I am working on a problem I never think about beauty. I only think about how to solve the problem. But when I have finished, if the solution is not beautiful, I know it is wrong."
- Buckminster Fuller (1895-1983)
"In science one tries to tell people, in such a way as to be understood by everyone, something that no one ever knew before. But in poetry, it's the exact opposite."
- Paul Dirac (1902-1984)
"I would have made a good Pope."
- Richard M. Nixon (1913-1994)
"Anyone who considers arithmetical methods of producing random digits is, of course, in a state of sin."
- John von Neumann (1903-1957)
"The mistakes are all waiting to be made."
- chessmaster Savielly Grigorievitch Tartakower (1887-1956) on the game's opening position
"It is unbecoming for young men to utter maxims."
- Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)
"Grove giveth and Gates taketh away."
- Bob Metcalfe (inventor of Ethernet) on the trend of hardware speedups not being able to keep up with software demands
"Reality is merely an illusion, albeit a very persistent one."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"One of the symptoms of an approaching nervous breakdown is the belief that one's work is terribly important."
- Bertrand Russell (1872-1970)
"A little inaccuracy sometimes saves a ton of explanation."
- H. H. Munro (Saki) (1870-1916)
"There are two ways of constructing a software design; one way is to make it so simple that there are obviously no deficiencies, and the other way is to make it so complicated that there are no obvious deficiencies. The first method is far more difficult."
- C. A. R. Hoare
"Make everything as simple as possible, but not simpler."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"What do you take me for, an idiot?"
- General Charles de Gaulle (1890-1970), when a journalist asked him if he was happy
"I heard someone tried the monkeys-on-typewriters bit trying for the plays of W. Shakespeare, but all they got was the collected works of Francis Bacon."
- Bill Hirst
"Three o'clock is always too late or too early for anything you want to do."
- Jean-Paul Sartre (1905-1980)
"A doctor can bury his mistakes but an architect can only advise his clients to plant vines."
- Frank Lloyd Wright (1868-1959)
"It is dangerous to be sincere unless you are also stupid."
- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
"If you haven't got anything nice to say about anybody, come sit next to me."
- Alice Roosevelt Longworth (1884-1980)
"A man can't be too careful in the choice of his enemies."
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"Forgive your enemies, but never forget their names."
- John F. Kennedy (1917-1963)
"Logic is in the eye of the logician."
- Gloria Steinem
"No one can earn a million dollars honestly."
- William Jennings Bryan (1860-1925)
"Everything has been figured out, except how to live."
- Jean-Paul Sartre (1905-1980)
"Well-timed silence hath more eloquence than speech."
- Martin Fraquhar Tupper
"Thank you for sending me a copy of your book - I'll waste no time reading it."
- Moses Hadas (1900-1966)
"From the moment I picked your book up until I laid it down I was convulsed with laughter. Some day I intend reading it."
- Groucho Marx (1895-1977)
"It is better to have a permanent income than to be fascinating."
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"When ideas fail, words come in very handy."
- Goethe (1749-1832)
"In the end, everything is a gag."
- Charlie Chaplin (1889-1977)
"The nice thing about egotists is that they don't talk about other people."
- Lucille S. Harper
"You got to be careful if you don't know where you're going, because you might not get there."
- Yogi Berra
"I love Mickey Mouse more than any woman I have ever known."
- Walt Disney (1901-1966)
"He who hesitates is a damned fool."
- Mae West (1892-1980)
"Good teaching is one-fourth preparation and three-fourths theater."
- Gail Godwin
"University politics are vicious precisely because the stakes are so small."
- Henry Kissinger (1923-)
"The graveyards are full of indispensable men."
- Charles de Gaulle (1890-1970)
"You can pretend to be serious; you can't pretend to be witty."
- Sacha Guitry (1885-1957)
"Behind every great fortune there is a crime."
- Honore de Balzac (1799-1850)
"If women didn't exist, all the money in the world would have no meaning."
- Aristotle Onassis (1906-1975)
"I am not young enough to know everything."
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"The object of war is not to die for your country but to make the other bastard die for his."
- General George Patton (1885-1945)
"Sometimes a scream is better than a thesis."
- Ralph Waldo Emerson (1803-1882)
"There is no sincerer love than the love of food."
- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
"I don't even butter my bread; I consider that cooking."
- Katherine Cebrian
"I have an existential map; it has 'you are here' written all over it."
- Steven Wright
"Mr. Wagner has beautiful moments but bad quarters of an hour."
- Gioacchino Rossini (1792-1868)
"Manuscript: something submitted in haste and returned at leisure."
- Oliver Herford (1863-1935)
"I have read your book and much like it."
- Moses Hadas (1900-1966)
"The covers of this book are too far apart."
- Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914)
"Everywhere I go I'm asked if I think the university stifles writers. My opinion is that they don't stifle enough of them."
- Flannery O'Connor (1925-1964)
"Too many pieces of music finish too long after the end."
- Igor Stravinsky (1882-1971)
"Anything that is too stupid to be spoken is sung."
- Voltaire (1694-1778)
"When choosing between two evils, I always like to try the one I've never tried before."
- Mae West (1892-1980)
"I don't know anything about music. In my line you don't have to."
- Elvis Presley (1935-1977)
"No Sane man will dance."
- Cicero (106-43 B.C.)
"Hell is a half-filled auditorium."
- Robert Frost (1874-1963)
"Show me a sane man and I will cure him for you."
- Carl Gustav Jung (1875-1961)
"Vote early and vote often."
- Al Capone (1899-1947)
"If I were two-faced, would I be wearing this one?"
- Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)
"Few things are harder to put up with than a good example."
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)
"Hell is other people."
- Jean-Paul Sartre (1905-1980)
"I am become death, shatterer of worlds."
- Robert J. Oppenheimer (1904-1967) (citing from the Bhagavad Gita, after witnessing the world's first nuclear explosion)
"Happiness is good health and a bad memory."
- Ingrid Bergman (1917-1982)
"Friends may come and go, but enemies accumulate."
- Thomas Jones
"You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone."
- Al Capone (1899-1947)
"The gods too are fond of a joke."
- Aristotle (384-322 B.C.)
"Distrust any enterprise that requires new clothes."
- Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)
"The difference between pornography and erotica is lighting."
- Gloria Leonard
"It is time I stepped aside for a less experienced and less able man."
- Professor Scott Elledge on his retirement from Cornell
"Every day I get up and look through the Forbes list of the richest people in America. If I'm not there, I go to work."
- Robert Orben
"The cynics are right nine times out of ten."
- Henry Louis Mencken (1880-1956)
"There are some experiences in life which should not be demanded twice from any man, and one of them is listening to the Brahms Requiem."
- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)

"Attention to health is life greatest hindrance."
- Plato (427-347 B.C.)
"Plato was a bore."
- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)
"Nietzsche was stupid and abnormal."
- Leo Tolstoy (1828-1910)
"I'm not going to get into the ring with Tolstoy."
- Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961)
"Hemingway was a jerk."
- Harold Robbins

"How can I lose to such an idiot?"
- A shout from chessmaster Aaron Nimzovich (1886-1935)
"Not only is there no God, but try finding a plumber on Sunday."
- Woody Allen (1935-)
"I don't feel good."
- The last words of Luther Burbank (1849-1926)
"Nothing is wrong with California that a rise in the ocean level wouldn't cure."
- Ross MacDonald (1915-1983)
"Men have become the tools of their tools."
- Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)
"I have never let my schooling interfere with my education."
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)
"It is now possible for a flight attendant to get a pilot pregnant."
- Richard J. Ferris, president of United Airlines
"I never miss a chance to have sex or appear on television."
- Gore Vidal
"I don't want to achieve immortality through my work; I want to achieve immortality through not dying."
- Woody Allen (1935-)
"Men and nations behave wisely once they have exhausted all the other alternatives."
- Abba Eban (1915-)
"To sit alone with my conscience will be judgment enough for me."
- Charles William Stubbs
"Sanity is a madness put to good uses."
- George Santayana (1863-1952)
"Imitation is the sincerest form of television."
- Fred Allen (1894-1956)
"Always do right- this will gratify some and astonish the rest."
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)
"In America, anybody can be president. That's one of the risks you take."
- Adlai Stevenson (1900-1965)
"Copy from one, it's plagiarism; copy from two, it's research."
- Wilson Mizner (1876-1933)
"Why don't you write books people can read?"
- Nora Joyce to her husband James (1882-1941)
"Some editors are failed writers, but so are most writers."
- T. S. Eliot (1888-1965)
"Criticism is prejudice made plausible."
- Henry Louis Mencken (1880-1956)
"It is better to be quotable than to be honest."
- Tom Stoppard
"Being on the tightrope is living; everything else is waiting."
- Karl Wallenda
"Opportunities multiply as they are seized."
- Sun Tzu
"A scholar who cherishes the love of comfort is not fit to be deemed a scholar."
- Lao-Tzu (570?-490? BC)
" The best way to predict the future is to invent it."
- Alan Kay
"Never mistake motion for action."
- Ernest Hemingway (1899-1961)
"Hell is paved with good samaritans."
- William M. Holden
"The longer I live the more I see that I am never wrong about anything, and that all the pains that I have so humbly taken to verify my notions have only wasted my time."
- George Bernard Shaw (1856-1950)
"Silence is argument carried out by other means."
- Ernesto"Che"Guevara (1928-1967)
"Well done is better than well said."
- Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
"The average person thinks he isn't."
- Father Larry Lorenzoni
"Heav'n hath no rage like love to hatred turn'd, Nor Hell a fury, like a woman scorn'd."
- William Congreve (1670-1729)
"A husband is what is left of the lover after the nerve has been extracted."
- Helen Rowland (1876-1950)
"Learning is what most adults will do for a living in the 21st century."
- Perelman
"The man who goes alone can start today; but he who travels with another must wait till that other is ready."
- Henry David Thoreau (1817-1862)
"There is a country in Europe where multiple-choice tests are illegal."
- Sigfried Hulzer
"Ask her to wait a moment - I am almost done."
- Carl Friedrich Gauss (1777-1855), while working, when informed that his wife is dying
"A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty."
- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
"I think there is a world market for maybe five computers."
- Thomas Watson (1874-1956), Chairman of IBM, 1943
"I think it would be a good idea."
- Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948), when asked what he thought of Western civilization
"The only thing necessary for the triumph of evil is for good men to do nothing."
- Edmund Burke (1729-1797)
"I'm not a member of any organized political party, I'm a Democrat!"
- Will Rogers (1879-1935)
"If Stupidity got us into this mess, then why can't it get us out?" "
- Will Rogers (1879-1935)
"The backbone of surprise is fusing speed with secrecy."
- Von Clausewitz (1780-1831)
"Democracy does not guarantee equality of conditions - it only guarantees equality of opportunity."
- Irving Kristol
"There is no reason anyone would want a computer in their home."
- Ken Olson, president, chairman and founder of Digital Equipment Corp., 1977
"640K ought to be enough for anybody."
- Bill Gates (1955-), in 1981
"The concept is interesting and well-formed, but in order to earn better than a 'C', the idea must be feasible."
- A Yale University management professor in response to student Fred Smith's paper proposing reliable overnight delivery service (Smith went on to found Federal Express Corp.)
"Who the hell wants to hear actors talk?"
- H. M. Warner (1881-1958), founder of Warner Brothers, in 1927
"We don't like their sound, and guitar music is on the way out."
- Decca Recording Co. rejecting the Beatles, 1962
"Everything that can be invented has been invented."
- Charles H. Duell, Commissioner, U.S. Office of Patents, 1899
"Denial ain't just a river in Egypt."
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)
"A pint of sweat, saves a gallon of blood."
- General George S. Patton (1885-1945)
"After I'm dead I'd rather have people ask why I have no monument than why I have one."
- Cato the Elder (234-149 BC, AKA Marcus Porcius Cato)
"He can compress the most words into the smallest idea of any man I know."
- Abraham Lincoln (1809-1865)
"Don't let it end like this. Tell them I said something."
- last words of Pancho Villa (1877-1923)
"The right to swing my fist ends where the other man's nose begins."
- Oliver Wendell Holmes (1841-1935)
"The difference between fiction and reality? Fiction has to make sense."
- Tom Clancy
"It's not the size of the dog in the fight, it's the size of the fight in the dog."
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)
"It is better to be feared than loved, if you cannot be both."
- Niccolo Machiavelli (1469-1527), "The Prince"
"Whatever is begun in anger ends in shame."
- Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790)
"The President has kept all of the promises he intended to keep."
- Clinton aide George Stephanopolous speaking on Larry King Live
"We're going to turn this team around 360 degrees."
- Jason Kidd, upon his drafting to the Dallas Mavericks
"Half this game is ninety percent mental."
- Yogi Berra
"There is only one nature - the division into science and engineering is a human imposition, not a natural one. Indeed, the division is a human failure; it reflects our limited capacity to comprehend the whole."
- Bill Wulf
"There's many a bestseller that could have been prevented by a good teacher."
- Flannery O'Connor (1925-1964)
"He has all the virtues I dislike and none of the vices I admire."
- Sir Winston Churchill (1874-1965)
"I criticize by creation - not by finding fault."
- Cicero (106-43 B.C.)
"Love is friendship set on fire."
- Jeremy Taylor
"God gave men both a penis and a brain, but unfortunately not enough blood supply to run both at the same time."
- Robin Williams, commenting on the Clinton/Lewinsky affair
"My occupation now, I suppose, is jail inmate."
- Unibomber Theodore Kaczynski, when asked in court what his current profession was
"Woman was God's second mistake."
- Friedrich Nietzsche (1844-1900)
"This isn't right, this isn't even wrong."
- Wolfgang Pauli (1900-1958), upon reading a young physicist's paper
"For centuries, theologians have been explaining the unknowable in terms of the-not-worth-knowing."
- Henry Louis Mencken (1880-1956)
"Pray, v.: To ask that the laws of the universe be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy."
- Ambrose Bierce (1842-1914)
"Every normal man must be tempted at times to spit upon his hands, hoist the black flag, and begin slitting throats."
- Henry Louis Mencken (1880-1956)
"Now, now my good man, this is no time for making enemies."
- Voltaire (1694-1778) on his deathbed in response to a priest asking that he renounce Satan.
"Fill the unforgiving minute with sixty seconds worth of distance run."
- Rudyard Kipling (1865-1936)
"He would make a lovely corpse."
- Charles Dickens (1812-1870)
"I've just learned about his illness. Let's hope it's nothing trivial."
- Irvin S. Cobb
"I worship the quicksand he walks in."
- Art Buchwald
"Wagner's music is better than it sounds."
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)
"A poem is never finished, only abandoned."
- Paul Valery (1871-1945)
"We are not retreating - we are advancing in another Direction."
- General Douglas MacArthur (1880-1964)
"If you were plowing a field, which would you rather use? Two strong oxen or 1024 chickens?"
- Seymour Cray (1925-1996), father of supercomputing
"#3 pencils and quadrille pads."
- Seymoure Cray (1925-1996) when asked what CAD tools he used to design the Cray I supercomputer; he also recommended using the back side of the pages so that the lines were not so dominant.
"I just bought a Mac to help me design the next Cray."
- Seymoure Cray (1925-1996) when was informed that Apple Inc. had recently bought a Cray supercomputer to help them design the next Mac.
"Your Highness, I have no need of this hypothesis."
- Pierre Laplace (1749-1827), to Napoleon on why his works on celestial mechanics make no mention of God.
"I choose a block of marble and chop off whatever I don't need."
- Francois-Auguste Rodin (1840-1917), when asked how he managed to make his remarkable statues
"The man who does not read good books has no advantage over the man who cannot read them."
- Mark Twain (1835-1910)
"The truth is more important than the facts."
- Frank Lloyd Wright (1868-1959)
"Research is what I'm doing when I don't know what I'm doing."
- Wernher Von Braun (1912-1977)
"There are only two tragedies in life: one is not getting what one wants, and the other is getting it."
- Oscar Wilde (1854-1900)
"There are only two ways to live your life. One is as though nothing is a miracle. The other is as though everything is a miracle."
- Albert Einstein (1879-1955)
"He who fights with monsters should see to it that he himself does not become a monster....when you gaze long into the abyss the abyss also gazes into you..."
-Friedrich Nietzsche, Beyond Good and Evil

"
"Sanity is a full time job ... I'm on vacation"
-

"They that can give up essential liberty to obtain a little temporary safety deserve neither liberty nor safety."
-Benjamin Franklin

"The enemy is anybody who is going to get you killed, no matter which side he's on. " -Joseph Heller, Catch 22.

"Pazíte in varujte se vsake pohlepnosti, kajti življenje nikogar ni v obilju iz njegovega premoženja."
-Jezus,Lk 12:15

"Do what you don't know how to do"
- Sid Vicious(on bo že vedu)

"When Freedom is outlawed, only outlaws have freedom"
-ananonim

"Democracy is a form of religion: It is the worship of jackals by jackasses."
-H.L. Mencken

"Democracy: the bludgeoning of the people, by the people, for the people."
-Oscar Wilde.

"Only dead fish flow with the current"
-anonim

"Most people would sooner die than think; in fact, they do
so."
--Bertrand Russell

"All men dream: but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds wake in the day to find that it was vanity: but the dreamers of the day are the dangerous men, for they may act their dreams with open eyes, to make it possible."
- T. E. Lawrence

"Society in every state is a blessing, but government, even in its best stage, is but a necessary evil; in its worst state an intolerable one."
- Common Sense - 1776

"First they came for the Jews
and I did not speak out -
because I was not a Jew

Then they came for the communist
and I did not speak out -
because I was not a communist

Then they came for the trade unionists
and I did not speak out -
because I was not a trade unionists.

Then they came for me -
and there was no one left
to speak out for me."

Pastor Niemoeler (victim of the Nazis)

Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose... it's how drunk you get.

It all goes back and back, to our mothers and fathers and theirs before them. We are puppets dancing on the strings of those who came before us, and one day our own children will take up our strings and dance in our steads.

The Common people pray for rain, healthy children and a summer that never ends. It is no matter to them if the high lords play their game of thrones, so long as they are left in peace. . .They never are.

"One time, Shagga cut a man's head off, and he did not even know it until he brushed his hair, and it fell off." "Is that why you never brush yours?"

Only a fool humbles himself when the world is so full of men eager to do that job for him.

You rule like a man dancing on rotten ice. I daresay you will make a noble splash.

In the end, the one with the biggest gun wins.

It's not whether you win or. . .Okay, maybe it is. . .

After World War III, the only thing left will be roaches and lawyers.

Nothing ever goes missing that they don't look at me, ever since that time I lost my horse. As if that could be helped. He was white and it was snowing, what did they expect?

There are worse ways to die than warm and drunk.

The dead are likely dull fellows, full of tedious complaints - the grounds too cold, my gravestone should be larger, why does he get more worms than I do. . .

Life is short - run to finish it sooner.

I did nothing today and it was everything I expected it to be.

Can you look around this world and believe in the goodness of a god who rules it? Famine, Pestilence, War, Disease and Death! They rule this world.

Memorize quotes. They're useful in ending and winning arguments. Then again, so are semi-automatic weapons.

I thoroughly disapprove of duels. I consider them unwise and I know they are dangerous. Also, sinful. If a man should challenge me now I would go to that man and take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet retired spot and kill him.

I believe in looking reality straight in the eye and denying it.

This week, envy rears its ugly head, realizes there's nothing enviable about you, blinks a couple times, and goes back to sleep.

History is what we decide the future generations should know.

Man is the only kind of varmint that sets his own trap, baits it, then steps in it.

We firmly believe there is more to life than money, beer, and sex. We just don't know what it is.

Get your facts first, and then you can distort them as much as you please.

Do not take life too seriously; you will never get out of it alive.

When we remember we are all mad, the mysteries disappear and life stands explained.

Telling a teenager the facts of life is like giving a fish a bath.

He who makes a beast of himself gets rid of the pain of being a man.

The cost of living is dying. Everybody pays.

Never put off 'till tomorrow what you can do the day after tomorrow.

Man was made at the end of the week's work whne God was tired.

Speak the truth, but leave immediately after.

Man is harder than iron, stronger than stone, and more fragile than a rose.

I don't know what a scoundrel is like, but I know what a respectable man is like, and it's enough to make one's flesh creep.

All modern men are descended from a worm-like creature, but it shows more on some people.

Nobody will ever win the battle of the sexes. There's too much fraternizing with the enemy.

I am ready to meet my maker, but whether my maker is prepared for the great ordeal of meeting me is another matter.

Cheer up! The worst is yet to come.

Any fool can tell the truth, but it requires a man of some sense to know how to lie well.

Men stumble over the truth from time to time, but most pick themselves up and hurry off as if nothing happened.

As long as the legal procedures are satisfied, something as banal as truth needn't enter into it.

Dreaming permits each and every one of us to be quietly and safely insane every night of our lives.

Love is a slippery eel that bites like hell.

Love is a perky elf dancing a merry little jig and then suddenly he turns on you with a miniature machine gun.

Love is a snowmobile racing across the tundra and then suddenly it flips over, pinning you underneath. At night, the snow weasels come.

I'm not under the alkafluence of inkahol that some thinkle peep I am. It's just the drunker I sit here the longer I get.

When love is gone, there's always justice. And when justice is gone, there's always force. And when force is gone, there's always Mom. Hi, Mom!

The Universe is governed by the complex interweaving of 3 elements: Energy, Matter and Enlightened Self-Interest.

Do not mess with any jumper you do not know about even if it is labeled "SEX and FREE BEER"

Don't sweat petty things. . . or pet sweaty things.

Christ died for our sins. Dare we make his martyrdom meaningless by not committing them.

All men are created unequal.

Everything in excess! Moderation is for monks!

Nothing is so simple the government can't screw it up.

Some people talk better when they breathe vacuum.

It's not that I'm afraid to die, I just don't want to be there when it happens.

Learn from the mistakes of others. You can't live long enough to make them all yourself.

Don't go through life with your eyes closed or you might run into the doors.

Life is hard. After all, it kills you.

Unfortunately, killing is one of those things that gets easier the more you do it.

Oh well, no matter what happens there's always death.

Here lies an atheist, all dressed up and nowhere to go.

A sobering thought: What if, right at this very moment, I am living up to my full potential?

If sex is a pain in the butt you're doing it wrong.

Sex is not the answer. Sex is the question, 'Yes' is the answer.

Good sex is like a good game of Bridge. If you don't have a good partner you better have a good hand.

Don't knock masturbation, it's sex with someone I love.

Sex without love is an empty experience. But as far as empty experiences go it's one of the best.

As she lay there dozing next to me one voice inside my head keeps saying, "Relax. . .you aren't the first doctor to sleep with one of his patients." Another kept reminding me, "Howard, you're a vet.

Why should we take advice on sex from the pope? If he knows anything about it, he shouldn't!

Why sex is better than gods? It's ok to yell 'Oh God' during sex but it's not to yell 'Oh ****' during church.

Sex is like math; add a female, subtract the cloths, divide the legs, and hope like hell you don't multiply!

The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one.

God bless Atheism!

If God had meant for us to be naked, we would have been born that way.

God may well have his reasons, but he seems to use a lotta psychotics to carry out his job orders.

If only God would give me some clear sign! Like making a large deposit in my name at the Swiss bank.

Give a man a fish and you'll feed him for a day; give him religion, and he'll starve to death while praying for a fish.

And God said: 'Let there be Satan, so people don't blame everything on me. And let there be lawyers, so people don't blame everything on Satan.

If God had wanted people to give blow jobs, he wouldn't have given them teeth.

An apology for the Devil: It must be remembered that we have only heard one side of the case. God has written all the books.

Pray: To ask the laws of the universe to be annulled on behalf of a single petitioner confessedly unworthy.

I was working on a flat-tax proposal and I accidentally proved there is no God. (- Homer J. Simpson.. no.. really?)

I don't suffer from insanity, I enjoy every minute of it.

Some people are alive just because it's illegal to kill them.

Natives who beat drums to drive off evil spirits are objects of scorn to smart Americans who blow horns to break up traffic jams.

Of all the things I've lost, I miss my mind the most.

I was normal once. . .I didn't like it.

The depressing thing about tennis is that no matter how good I get, I'll never be as good as the wall.

Some people say I must be a horrible person. That's not true. I have the heart of a young boy. . .on my desk.

Due to recent cutbacks, the light at the end of the tunnel has been turned off until further notice.

Due to lack of interest, tomorrow has been cancelled.

If ignorance is bliss you must be orgasmic.

And remember. . .it takes 42 muscles to frown, and only 4 to lift thy middle finger and say 'Bite me.'

Sometimes I lie awake at night and ask why me? Then a voice answers, 'Nothing personal, your name just happened to come up.'

Doesn't it strike you as mildly ironic how most of the people that are against abortion are people that you wouldn't wanna **** in the first place?

You can get more with a kind word and a gun than you can with a kind word alone.

Without question, the greatest invention in the history of mankind is beer. Oh, I grant you that the wheel was also a fine invention, but the wheel does not go nearly as well with pizza.

If a vegetarian is someone who eats vegetables, what does that make a humanitarian?

If you learn from your mistakes, then why ain't I a genius?

The dumber people think you are, the more surprised they're going to be when you kill them.

A hypocrite is the man who murdered his parents, and then pleaded for mercy on the grounds that he was an orphan.

I can picture in my mind a world without war, a world without hate. And I can picture us attacking that world, because they'd never expect it.

I loathe people who keep dogs. They are cowards who have not got the guts to bite people themselves.

There are moments when everything goes well; don't be frightened, it won't last.

Too often, the opportunity knocks, but by the time you push back the chain, push back the bolt, unhook the two locks and shut off the burglar alarm, it's too late.

Most men who are not married by the age of thirty-five are either homosexual or really smart.

It is a good thing to follow the First Law of Holes; if you are in one, stop digging.

My parents put us to sleep by tossing us up in the air. Of course, you have to have low ceilings for this method to work.

They laughed at Einstein. They laughed at the Wright Brothers. But they also laughed at Bozo the Clown.

A man doesn't automatically get my respect. He has to get down in the dirt and beg for it.

Listen, the bottom line on cigarette smoking is it's really just the way you interpret things. I mean, they say smoking gives you cancer. Sure, you can be negative and look at that as a bad thing, or you can see that smoking 'gives' you cancer. It 'gives' it to you. It's a present. Here, here's cancer. . .Why, thank you very much, Mr. Cigarette.

If I ever get real rich, I hope I'm not real mean to poor people, like I am now.

Just because you have a computer, doesn't mean you can't be stupid.

Puritainism- the haunting fear that someone, somewhere is happy.

I became insane. . .with intervals of horrible sanity.

Why shave, when I can' think of a reason for living.

It's a good thing we have gravity or else when birds dies they'd just stay right up there. Hunters would be all confused.

Consider the daffodil. And while you're doing that, I'll be over here, looking through your stuff.

[ August 23, 2002, 20:24: Message edited by: vonGriffin ]

 

Most surely you did not write that by typing it did you? I mean .

 

Hey, Silverblade, that quote's from the Simpsons, isn't it... I think.

But I can't think of another quote right know.

Frosty
( Playing way to much NWN)

 

well this is for all quote lovers

 

I never said I don't like it but of what use is it to you if your fingers fall off from typing all that .

 

I like quotes as much as the next guy, but here's a poll for this topic.

How many people actually had time to read all of vonGriffin's reply?

 

hmp,,,and this is only part 1

 

their is simple no justice anymore...

so goes my part 2

I can delete the "who said them" part

[ August 23, 2002, 21:09: Message edited by: vonGriffin ]

 

"Banned!"

Quote by Blackthorn TA to vongriffon on 8/23/02 @ 2:10pm

-----
Who said, "Would you classify that as a launch problem or a design problem?"

 

*whew*

Ok, so here's mine.

1. "You know, sometimes they can't tell when you're *acting* and when you're *not*."

2. "It's not important for them to know; it's only important for *me* to know."

 

You guys are good, the last two stumped me... how about this one.

"I'll have a steak sandwich, a bloody mary, and a steak sandwich."