Friends: SP v. RL

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I'll probably never meet people from SP. That is true. But I have friends in RL that I'll probably not see again.

With the death thing - I cry for both.

Some people may think I've revealed a lot on here, but I haven't. To a couple of people, I have probably revealed more, either because I know them in RL, or because they've asked me or whatever.

but the thing is, on SP, nobody cares what you look like, how well you do in school or how rich you are. Nobody bothers whether you can't do things or can. Everyone will accept you as long as you are polite and don't break rules. In RL, people will bully you because you can't do PE, or because you can do maths, they'll refuse to talk to you because you are overweight or don't wear make-up and will tease you because of disabilities or impediments.

in Real-Life, it's seems so false, but on SP, and other places online it seems more real, you can't tell who lies, that is true, and you need to be careful, but you can't be hurt like in the real world.

And to tell hte truth. I often get muddled with RL and FAntasy, so it doesn't matter anyway

 

I doubt I've ever shared anything particularly personal here nor would I. It is difficult for me to consider anyone a friend who I haven't met and spent personal time with. However, I must note I have a narrower definition of 'friend' than many people. I have lots of 'acquaintances' who I'll go have a beer with or play a pick up game with etc. Not as many who at the drop of a hat I'd drive across country even though it puts me in a truly bad situation.

Part of it probably has to do with a male/female stereotype that I've bought into. I can't count the number of years ago that I cried on my two hands - it would be terribly shameful for me to do so in public. I've been with my gf for a couple of years now and we live together but I haven't cried in front of her - to her occasional frustration apparently.

All that's to say, when guys are like that they are also, imo, less likely to 'open up' on an internet chatboard despite its supposed anonymity.

I've never begrudged anyone for using it in that manner though; I will admit I have read those posts and thought 'not me' however.

Clint Eastwood's Spaghetti Westerns should be the guide for all things manly - a sort of What Would Clint Do? He wouldn't share personal info on the internet that's what he wouldn't do

 

Yes, indeed. I am, for one, the shyest person I know. Well, second-shyest, the first is a friend of mine. But anyway, I come here, and I can speak my mind, no matter how inane, silly, or unusual my opinion. The vast majority of people who know me think of me as a wild guy with an odd sense of humour. 'Intellectual' doesn't exactly leap off their tongues when describing me.

Yet here, people accept me for who I am, because that's all they get to see. SP is sort of an oasis of sanity in, of all places, the insane ocean of the Internet.

I don't really have any close friends on SP, but I do recognize my fellow members and their senses of humour.

 

Doesn't really work that way. The fun thing is that all people share the affiliation with computers, gaming and RPG/fantasy stuff. Also, most display some acceptable level of mental and intellectual capacity, which is uncommon with general, non-select real-life groups.

 

I agree with Chev, the people on SP is more often than not very alike, with me being the exeption.

And I wouldn't cry for ethier of the dead people, just feel a little sad for them both.

I remember when Elementus died here on SP, I was sad, but I haven't cried for years so why would I do it now? I just can't cry, I just can't. I don't have a problem with that.

And I don't care if someone I dislike dies, not even in RL, that's just how I am.

Life sucks, it's a fact 99% of the time.

 

I don't usually cry, if I do it's for a reason, and one of the rare times I actually show an emotion. If I do cry I always get annoyed with myself. Which everyone thinks is a bad thing.

The thing is - I am always very careful about what I say and where/when, because you hear all these stories about people going missing or being taken by people they meet. I've been brought up paranoid but then I feel stupid if I ask for help or say something about myself, even if it seems like a good idea or I need to tell someone.

Suppose I'm not a people person

 

I am planning to meet as many SP people as possible... thus far I have met Eze, Harkle and Foradasthar....

 

Real life outlives SP anyday.
Sorry fellas, but if SP is seriously anyones life besides Taluntain, something is wrong and needs fixing and dedication. Most of all dedication.

 

I met Herf over the weekend and camped together at a festival. That was amazing, to actually see someone in RL whom you met at SP. Yet, I seem to find that people on SP know me better than I probably do myself!

I wouldn't say I trust SPers more than my real life friends, but I will say that I may feel more comfortable telling them things because I won't be able to hear them laugh

 

Completely on the contrary. Over the net I'm an antisocial bastard with little sympathy for anything. I watch very carefully not to say anything that would lead to a realistic, accurrate impression of my true nature. Not because I'm so paranoid, or because I was some other "actually a very intelligent individual but I just like to play something other", as I've heard people lie of themselves so many times. Just because here it never has to get personal, and I just can't see anything being taken seriously. I'm the guy who hates talking things over the phone, and relishes in a face-to-face conversation.

I can't make friends over the net, it's impossible because there are far too many blockades prohibiting me from "baring my soul" enough to make way for possible friendship. Besides, I need to know a person, get a feel of them before I can trust them. In real life I can become a very good friend with someone within a very short time. Rarely have I been disappointed with someone who I really trusted (only once, really), with the "casual friends" it's another story of course.

Edit: It's like when I see these threads of how someone's wife left him, or how their life sucks, etc. It's not that I wouldn't feel sympathy in those cases, it's just that it seems very vain, dumb and plainly lame to say anything over the net. Perhaps it's different with those who really are friends, who have reason to claim that they actually sympathize. But in my case I can only see that I would make an idiot out of myself, and definitely not be of any help to the person in question. If this happens in real life, you can be sure that even if this person was someone I just met yesterday, he'd get my full attention and I definitely would not undermine their loss in anyway, even if there was nothing I could do to help them.

 

As for me, I have very few friends of any kind.
I mean, I'm still only very new to SP and I'm still a little paranoid, hey, it's in my nature, I'm another of the millions upon millions from a broken home and in the 27 years of my life so far I still haven't dealt with it well, probably never will, and as a result I strive for acceptance and sometimes take things the wrong way (such as posting on a thread and seemingly killing it - eg the 'suicide' thread, I know it's not personal but as I said - paranoia) Good or ill I just strive for acceptance and unfortunately I feel maybe the 'poor me' coming out.

As for RL, the only real friends I have are maybe 3 guys at my Dads In Distress meetings and I guess that's only because they know where I'm coming from on my trouble seeing my 6 year old son. So I guess that for mow I'd have to say my RL friends for that simple fact.

And as for crying over death, the only time I've ever really cried over a death was my 13 year old dog 3 and a half years ago. How pathetic is THAT? Though since my relationship break up, I get teary over almost anything vaguely emotional. Again I ask how pathetic is that?