Funniest quotes and answer choices

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Dont think you guys got this yet, since I read all the reply. This is from the TOB, it's Imoen and Edwin. Imoen says somthing like her being a Bhallspawn, and Edwin being scared of her. Edwin replies. Afterwards, Imoen goes "BOO" and Edwin startled. Imoen laughed a li`l bit, saying "I go Boo and he jumps off his skin" os something like that...

 

I read this whole thread just before the weekend. But I can't remember anymore wether this was here or not, so I apologize if it is.

In Firkraag's dungeon, there is this part where you sway from the needed path a bit and get this mission from Samia (or something such like) to get her stuff for "academic purposes" because her blood is denied entrance. If you take a bit more sceptical approach to the situation, she says something like: "..I'm not just a well-bosomed adventuress out to make a fame.." I had a good laugh at that Tomb Raider mock.

 

Reasons why the Spectator RULES!

"If you are going to ask me for a game of peek-a-boo,Im not interested"

-What can u tell me about those two imps?

"Ah they have been here since that drow who summoned me was slaughtered..Sixty years with two imps and a mad fish-king for company!Is this hell??"

-Are you sure I can't look in that chest you guard?

"What?Are you in a desperate need,or something?Have you a dying relative that desperately needs whats in this chest?"

"OH,I get it!You just HAVE to have what's in this chest right??? Because if a Beholder's guarding it,it HAS to be cool!"

"Keep in mind the drow who summoned me was mad.But,hey,who I am to judge,I suppose.I've been playing tic-tac-toe with a pair of imps for 60 years"

Now Interplay gave a recital of humor here..every time Im sad I just look at this line and my day brightens

 

Just remebered some other funny lines. When you get Aerie tot talk to Salvanas in the Copper Coronet (don't know if this has already been posted), the conversation goes like this:

s-Hello, my pretty dove (sounds like Haer'dalis). I am Salvanas...and I am so pleased that my gaze has chanced to fall upon you...
a-Are you talknig to me?
s-But of course I am talking to you...your skin is so pale, your gaze so innocent and your hips so rounded...I burn with sudden, aching desire!
a-Quayle told me about men like you. Go away sir. And stop touching my hand!
s-But I am helpless but to reach out for you, my dove (gag). Your beauty calls to me, stirs my passions within me!
a-You'll have a magic missle or two within you pretty soon! Now stop this nonsense! (Ouch!)

Likewise, if Jaheira talks to him...
s-Ah, I sense you have an earthy wisdom about you, my sweet elf. I find that most sensual.
j-Do you also find sensual my disdain for your disgusting manner?
s-Ah, such passion! You set me on fire with your words...and with your lovely body, as well...
j-I could set you on fire with more than that, if you truly wish.
s-Welll...er, no, not really...
j-The first thing of sense you have said. Now stay out of my way. (Harsh!)

Alas, I did not have any other females in my party, so I'll have to wait for those conversations. Unless any of you people know them...

 

With Salvanas -

Nalia
- That's a pretty line - but i heard you say exactly the same thing to Priss just the other day.

Viconia(IIRC)
Sal - How I wish to spend a night with you
Vic - I doubt you would be able to stand my power
Sal - I would die to spend the night with you.
Vic - Suddenly I am tempted - but no, I shall refrain.

 

Lo everybody! Merry krizmuz and happy new year. This my first post (reply) here so I though on replying here on this very interesting topic.

All in all, theres a lot of funny quotes around in whole BG saga. Bit offtopic since this is ToB part of forum, but most of you replied with quotes from several games. So here's couple of mine from original BG:

-"Never spit in a man's face unless he's mustache is on fire" - Portalbendarwinden
-"My lung is all over the dirt. Damn" - Portalbendarwinden"

Im not sure for both =) (if they are said by him or are they correctly typed). Doh, but i think they are correct.

Ill prolly find lotsa more since im just starting to play BG saga and some other RPGs at same time ( ) all over again.

In my opinion, funniest characters are: Xzar (as first true comedian (actually him and Montaron as duo)), Minsc, Edwin (bg and bg2), Tiax (some cool phrases), Korgan, Lilarcor (sword), and Spectator/Beholder-in-sahaugin-city.

Many more NPC's i'm sure but i could only think of these for now =).

P.S. many more encounters, characters and ppl who have no idea of your character's heritage, are funnier than these characters i listed, though there are too many to list =)

 

Edwin: What is the opposite of lesson?
Minsc: Opposite of lesson ... less on ... more on!
The opposite of lesson is more on! More on?
Do you dare to insult me once again?

(Fight breaks out)

 

If the protagonist has a low int in the drow city:

Solaufein: Do you know what a devourer is?
PC: Uh...an otyugh?
Sol: No, you moronic dolt!

 

Xyphys where did you find that one? It's great.

Here's on of my favourites (don't sue me if it ain't 100% correctly transferred)...

Minsc: The bars, they bend and twist at my beserker strength... now I will... now... now...
Minsc (continued from above): Oh hoo... You're a smart one, I see this now... allmost as smart as Boo sometimes. You said that just to get me mad, mad enough to break free.

It's much better when Minsc actually says it.

 

8people.

Edwina's reply to Salvanas is by far the best of all the with female chats he has... Try it and see...

 

@ Rathan:

For me it happened when I was working for the Shadow Thieves and was asked to clear out the vampires underneath the Graveyard. A lot of time had already passed with both Edwin and Minsc in the party and suddenly that conversation popped up.

 

Edwin to Minsc: "Is the hamster speaking to you now, Minsc? Are his thaughts... entertaining?"

 

I think it was more like: *coughing and choking* *gasp* My lung! *gasp* I-it's flopping all over the dirt! *gasp* Damn.

At least, that's how I remember it.

 

Hmm... these are all so good. I don't think my favorite one has been posted though.

Edwin after being summoned to the Pocket Plane.

"What?! This better be important! I was in the middle of a very important business transaction! (And to think, I had the wench bargained down to 3 gold pieces for the night! Bah!)"

Xzar - a simple, but hilarious quote

"You there! Unwashed One! I'd have a word with you!"

[ January 15, 2003, 03:40: Message edited by: InquisitorX ]

 

Jan: Time for a litle adventure, is it? I figured as much. I saw some ogres down in Amn capture a small Bhaalspawn...a kobold, that one. My but that Bhaal got around, didn't he? Anyway, they were stewing him in a big iron pot and I thought to myself "Jan, my boy, that's adventure you're smelling".
<CHARNAME>: That's horrible!
Jan: Not as horrible as the stew. Very bland, no salt.

And then there is always the one when you finish the game, the character profiles.

Edwin died while challenging Elminster to a battle to determine who was the mightier wizard. There is, however a woman named Edwina working in a tavern in Thay. She is a bitter, bitter woman.

[ January 17, 2003, 01:31: Message edited by: Baezlebub ]

 

I knew it had to be something like that with Edwin. But really, watch for saying that in the future. I just recently got caught of putting up a spoil natured post myself, and this is what I get for it it seems. I haven't played through ToB with Edwin yet, so was kind of expecting to see his ending myself.

 

Try to get closer to Salvanas when playing with female PC...

 

Well, it seems bad but... hehe. When you are about to naughty- naughty with Aerie:
PC: Er...I can't get past those huge lumps of scar tissue on your shoulders. I'm really not in the mood

 

You really must try speaking to salvanas with Edwina. Its a laugh.

I particularly like minscs line refering to the netherscroll quest.

Minsc: I am glad that the evil wizard is gone, but who is this woman in red that is following us around?

Something to that effect.

Cheers.

 

How about Cespenar's
"pack rat you is youse going hell"
"what is this a glove?what is you a rock star? oh here is another"
and
Keldorn and Jan arguing about "flesh golem's sexy adventures(motions?)"