Funny and light-hearted personality tests

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Personality Test: ARTIST
(Dominant Introvert Abstract Feeler )
Like just 4% of the population you are an ARTIST (DIAF)--creative, adventurous, and deep. Although you are an introvert, your dominant ideas lead you to assert yourself often--especially through your work. You actively put your creativity to constructive use, and because you are ruled by your heart you are less likely to be inhibited by logic.

You have an intuitive understanding of emotion and know how evoke it in others, but the real world can be a prison of foolishness and embarrassment if you don't get your head out of the clouds a little more. Also, you are 87% likely to write poetry. Please, for the love of God, stop now.

Riight, not exactly what I'd have expected, though some parts are right

Pickup Apability: What's up frigidaire. You are 28% pickup-able! You're cold and unapproachable, like a big glacier that's unapproachable. And cold. Unlike the Arctic tundra, few even venture to plant their flag in you. You're definitely not a Scorpio, unless you were born between October 23 and November 21. The bad news is that you'll end up miserable and alone, probably knitting doilies out of cat hair. The good news is that this is apparently what you want. Honestly, I don't even feel comfortable talking to you right now, so I'm just gonna go… yeah… wash my friend's hair.

Heh, I guess this is a bit true Though I think it's mostly based upon the last page. I laughed at all the pickup lines. If you want to pick me up, you'd better be yourself, and not rely on a line.

Death Test: January 11, 2072, at the age of 89 years old. Heart Attack or Cancer most likely.

Great, as long as I'm not dependant on others for the last remainder of my life, I'm fine.

Love Test: Greetings, confusoid. You scored a... 56%
Is it a bird? A plane? Is it a boy? A girl? Is it love, or is it lust? Ah, you. You are that rare mix of sensitive and sensual, romantic and randy, pride and prejudice, etc. When you see your crush, you waffle like a Belgian, unsure of whether you'd rather paint their toes or suck on their toes. Poets have long been puzzled by your kind. You'll never fall for robots or nymphos, but you will suffer longs bouts of marriage.

Datability: Damn, Rico! You are... 81% dateable! Attractive and confident, witty and charming, a healthy ambrosia-based diet... you're wanted in the 48 contiguous states, you slayer. Call me. Seduce me. Make me a woman (or man.) Not only do you know how to turn a girl's (or guy's) engines on, but you also know how to oil, lube and rotate it. You put the "elation" back into "relationship," and the "night" back into "one-night stand."

Purity: 56% pure.

Unintelligence: 60% Un-telligent!
which is normal since the current average is 60%.

Here is the custom report of your personality that led our team of geeks to conclude (with confidence) that you are bordering on mediocrity, yet more exciting than others:

"The subject shows a very high level of intelligence, and his sense of observation is one of his best qualities. Considering this, he shows a lot of potential, but that's only part of the equation.

"Finally, the subject displayed a healthy (better than most net freaks anyway) sense of humor, a fair and productive sense of morality, and a lack of self-confidence. The balance of these three traits is important; high levels of confidence, medium levels of morality, and a good level of humor make for the strongest individuals."

Huh? What is it going to be? A lack of selfconfidence, or high levels of confidence? Other than that, pretty much correct.

 

Personality: Mastermind (Submissive Introvert Abstract Thinker )

Like just 8% of the population you are a MASTERMIND (SIAT). You can be silent and withdrawn, but behind your reserved exterior lies an active mind that allows you to analyze situations and come up with creative, unexpected solutions. Normal people call this "scheming." Don't learn German.

Anyway, your sense of style and originality are your strengths, and people will respect your judgment once they get to know you. If you learn to be a little more personable, you could be a great leader--you've definitely got the "vision" thing down. Just make sure all the plotting you do behind those eyes of yours is healthy.

Famous masterminds in television: Dr. Claw, The Scarecrow and Mrs. King, Montgomery Burns.

me a leader

Remember doing the unintelligence test a few months ago, got 86..


Edit: Pick-up-ability 22%

[ June 19, 2003, 12:12: Message edited by: Morgoth ]

 

Chevalier - my pickupability is probably low because it takes a lot to get me
I don't have to play hard to get - I already am

 

It's probably your beard .

 

MENTOR
(Submissive Extrovert Abstract Thinker )

Like just 6% of the population you are a MENTOR (SEAT). Some would call you the most powerful and influential of all people. Those people are wrong.

The reality is that you DON'T really WANT to impose personal views or beliefs on others. Yet you are extroverted and intelligent, and you like to get involved. So you help others with the pursuit of knowledge.

You're the reason that people say "teachers are also students." You are as much a learner as a master, and this satisfies you.

You won't die a lonely death, but towards the end you'll grow introspective, wondering if your life meant anything. This will last for decades, and you'll die after your spouse.

 

JUDGE
(Dominant Introvert Concrete Thinker)

Like just 3% of the population you are a JUDGE (DICT). Your affinity for facts and analytical approach to life help you some complex problems and make tough decisions that others cannot. But don't think you don't act like a ***** a lot of the time. You jump into arguments and hold grudges like crazy. Try jumping into the sack and holding buttocks, instead. You could probably use some love.

While some may see you as a bit overbearing and arrogant, your friends know that you are a trustworthy person with depth and a strong sense of righteousness. Although you are introverted and somewhat reserved, you have a forceful personality that your friends appreciate and your enemies fear. God help them. God help all of us.

Who? Me?
.
.
.

25% pickup-able...
I'm not that cold as it says. And I can't understand what the glacier has to do with me.
.
.
.

57% loveable
Is it a bird? A plane? Is it a boy? A girl? Is it love, or is it lust? Ah, you. You are that rare mix of sensitive and sensual, romantic and randy, pride and prejudice, etc. When you see your crush, you waffle like a Belgian, unsure of whether you'd rather paint their toes or suck on their toes. Poets have long been puzzled by your kind. You'll never fall for robots or nymphos, but you will suffer longs bouts of marriage.

(no comments)
.
.
.
73% dateable
NO WAY!

[ June 18, 2003, 16:14: Message edited by: Alexander the Great ]

 

Hell, I didn't know that....

 

Btw, I'm 75% pure. Heh-heh, here angels, angels, angels... let us become evil for one night...

 

I'm 14, why would I have a damn beard?

 

@8people: at least you realise something is wrong

 

8people is female, FYI.

 

indeed, ty Eze.

I certainly do not have a beard. and got 21% on the gay test - when you should get 32%

Take that, mother!

 

As though most people hadn't known already

25% here, normal men get 39%

 

LOL, a Mastermind (SIAT) for the personality test and 16% datability.

Nice, eh?

 

Me got on the Friend Test:

Slightly atonal chords and mildly distracting lights! You are
54%
rock-solid friend.


Are you a Virgo? I'm not surprised. You're a good friend at times, but other times you're harder to count on than an abacus coated with finger-repellent. And made of razor blades. You're the type of friend that when somebody asks you to hang out with them, you say you want to hang out but then you never actually specify a time, so that you don't actually have to hang out with that person. But you're generally trustworthy and sensitive to others' needs, like a warm elephant on a cold morning. You'll never be the Maid of Honor at a wedding, but you'll also never be the Maid of Dishonor. Don't be shy about using phlegm or bile to show your friends you care about them.

I am 46% Gay. What a bloody surprise.

The bloody Gender Test says that I am more male than female. Whee.

I am 27% slutty. Whee.

"You are a smooth chick."

You have a knack for greatness. For the record,you are:

78% Un-telligent!
which is significantly higher than the current average of 60%
Here is the custom report of your personality that led our team of geeks to conclude (with confidence) that you are resourceful and sly woman:

"The subject shows an astounding level of intelligence, and her sense of observation is one of her best qualities. Considering this, she shows a lot of potential, but that's only part of the equation.

"Also, as much as we hate violence, an occasional mauling is one way to solve day-to-day problems like unpleasant coworkers or pesky door-to-door salesmen; she just isn't tough enough, sir, and she avoids any solution that involves violence.

"Finally, the subject displayed a healthy (better than most net freaks anyway) sense of humor, a decent and respectable sense of morality, and a hot shot self-confidence. The balance of these three traits is important; high levels of confidence, medium levels of morality, and a good level of humor make for the strongest individuals."

Final Score: 78% Un-telligent

Cool.

I'll die June 25, 2069 at the age of 79 years old.

From the Inner Child Test:

Enfant Terrible
(Perverse Ignored Dysfunctional Child)


Your little inner child is l'Enfant Terrible (PIDC) --egotistical, malaligned, dark and pithy. Nothing in you makes any sense. It's like living inside an Emcee Escher drawing with DJ Salvador Dali on your inner wheels of steel.

If it's like that old fart Frued says, "where id was, there shall ego be," than your ego will soon be visiting Dysfunction Gulch by way of Isolation City, just past Pervert Palace. Strewn about the path along the way will be the carcasses of helpless relationships you've slaughtered.

There are two ways for you to grow up and stop acting like an ass:
1. grow up
2. stop acting like an ass

Other than all that stuff, he has fun at dance clubs, likes reading (yelling?) poetry and enjoys the taste of menthol cigarettes. Natch!

I am 46% bastard. LOL.

 

Personality test:

Untelligence Test:

[ June 21, 2003, 07:55: Message edited by: RotKU ]

 

I'm not really that sure about this. I never really saw myself as a "schemer." I'm really a kind, friendly sort of liberal. Really.

Like just 8% of the population you are a MASTERMIND (SIAT). You can be silent and withdrawn, but behind your reserved exterior lies an active mind that allows you to analyze situations and come up with creative, unexpected solutions. Normal people call this "scheming." Don't learn German.

Anyway, your sense of style and originality are your strengths, and people will respect your judgment once they get to know you. If you learn to be a little more personable, you could be a great leader--you've definitely got the "vision" thing down. Just make sure all the plotting you do behind those eyes of yours is healthy.

Like just 8% of the population you are a MASTERMIND (SIAT). You can be silent and withdrawn, but behind your reserved exterior lies an active mind that allows you to analyze situations and come up with creative, unexpected solutions. Normal people call this "scheming." Don't learn German.

Anyway, your sense of style and originality are your strengths, and people will respect your judgment once they get to know you. If you learn to be a little more personable, you could be a great leader--you've definitely got the "vision" thing down. Just make sure all the plotting you do behind those eyes of yours is healthy.

The funny thing is - I DO KNOW GERMAN! Why do I suddenly feel like sitting in a prison and writing about "My Struggle?"

Added:

Subject of Love:

Love hurts, don't it? You're in pure love— the kind with sonnets and hovering cherubs— and you ache like an old man's back for your crush. The superficial things that other people care about— money, looks, body odor— don't hold much water with you. You wouldn't care if your dreamboat were the Exxon Valdez, so don't be surprised if you ever fall in love with an oily barge. Respect the twinkie, but don't ignore its needs.

An oily barge? I think not! But I did score a 69. An interesting number...

[ June 21, 2003, 06:22: Message edited by: Chandos the Red ]

 

Oh well, I used to visit the Spark daily some time ago, and I did ALL the tests more then once, but just for you I'll do them all again...
(P.S.: go read the stinky feet diaries: they are hilarious!)

PERSONALITY: Politician (Dominant Extrovert Abstract Thinker )
The description fit quite well, even if I never thought about me as a damn "politician"!

PICK UP: Golden Mean - 58% (actually is far above average )

DEATH: June 26, 2059 (age 79, cancer or heart attack probably)

LOVE: 71% "Love hurts, don't it? You're in pure love— the kind with sonnets and hovering cherubs— and you ache like an old man's back for your crush." Absolutely true.

DATEABLE: 84% (well, I guess it's just a test... )

PURITY: 51% (Still high, I must improve to low it down! Eh eh eh...)

UN-INTELLIGENCE: 57% (Doh!)

 

Greetings, confusoid. You scored a... 39%
Is it a bird? A plane? Is it a boy? A girl? Is it love, or is it lust? Ah, you. You are that rare mix of sensitive and sensual, romantic and randy, pride and prejudice, etc. When you see your crush, you waffle like a Belgian, unsure of whether you'd rather paint their toes or suck on their toes. Poets have long been puzzled by your kind. You'll never fall for robots or nymphos, but you will suffer longs bouts of marriage.

Mild congratulations, you are... 63% dateable! You are neither more not less dateable than your peers-- welcome to the land of mediocrity, home of the masses! You have an undeniable animal magnetism, but you're just as likely to attract small animals as you are to attract human beings. Nevertheless, the people you flirt with generally find you funny and cute, or "fute." You have good hygiene, which is an imporant aspect of relationships involving two or more people. Avoid seafood and walks in the woods.

You are 51% Pure! (Very interesting.)

You have a knack for greatness. For the record,you are: 72% Un-telligent! which is significantly higher than the current average of 60%

Here is the custom report of your personality that led our team of geeks to conclude (with confidence) that you are resourceful and sly woman:
"The subject shows an above average level of intelligence, and her sense of observation is one of her best qualities. Considering this, she shows a lot of potential, but that's only part of the equation.
"Finally, the subject displayed a healthy (better than most net freaks anyway) sense of humor, a decent and respectable sense of morality, and a barbaric self-confidence. The balance of these three traits is important; high levels of confidence, medium levels of morality, and a good level of humor make for the strongest individuals."

Final Score: 72% Un-telligent