Post for random babbling, possibly with some sense, #3

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Theres this girl, shes mad at me for no reason and I think is hilarious! But you guys probably don't care.

 

Welcome back aline boy. Actually my name is Lazy Bonzo but it don't matter too much, i typo so much i have to edit most of my posts.

 

I was playing SpiderMand:The Movie and i thought some things it said were hirlious! such as when i was bad guy bowling, it said, "sir, that is not a where your saposed to uranate!" and
"we have a special on chilly fries, now with chilly" I couldn't stop laughing!!! Still can't stop! need to breath!

 

Another weekend wasted
Another weekend blown by
Another weekend were I did nothing
Another weekend wasted sitting on my big fat butt.
I feel wasted.

 

*******
DAY 17
*******

Cloud City Landing Dock

Lando stops ten feet from Han. The two men eye each other carefully. Lando shakes his head.

"Why, you slimy, double-crossing, no-good swindler! You've got a lot of guts coming here, after what you pulled." - Lando

Han points to himself innocently, mouthing, "Me?"

Lando moves threateningly toward Han. Suddenly, he throws his arms around his startled, long-lost friend and embraces him.

(laughs) "How you doing, you old pirate? So good to see you! I never thought I'd catch up with you again. Where you been?" - Lando

The two old friends embrace, laughing and chuckling.

"Well, he seems very friendly." - C-3PO

(wary) "Yes...very friendly." - Leia

"What are you doing here?" - Lando

(gestures toward the Falcon) "Ahh...repairs. I thought you could help me out." - Han

(in mock panic) "What have you done to my ship?" - Lando

"Your ship? Hey, remember, you lost her to me fair and square." - Han

"And how you doing Chewbacca? You still hanging around with this ol' loser?" - Lando

Chewie growls a reserved greeting.

Lando suddenly notices the princess and smiles.

"Hello. What have we here? Welcome. I'm Lando Calrissian, the administrator of this facility. And who might you be?" - Lando

"Leia." - Leia

"Welcome, Leia." - Lando

Lando bows before Leia and kisses her hand.

"All right, all right, you old smoothie." - Han

Han takes Leia by the hand and steers her away from Lando.

"Hello, sir. I am See-Threepio, human-cyborg relations. My facilities are at your..." - C-3PO

Before Threepio can finish his self-introduction, Lando has turned to follow Han and Leia, who are walking toward the city.

"Well, really!" - C-3PO



********

Findol the Swift, I do it to show my appreciation for the films and to count down until Episode II. It's a way of expressing my excitement, and making each day pass by with a good ol' Star Wars memory.

C-ya tomorrow.

 

Join the club DragonRider SkyWard, free admission. I love your daily dose of SW BigB, I remember every line so far

 

/me jumps up and down

Welcome back, alienboy!

/end happy mode

*sigh* I seem to have trouble with not misusing sharp objects lately. Life sucks.

Ara
(Ugh... My back has more kinks that Sirius Black... )

 

good one nobleman! (page 5)

 

lol

Way to make your point. (aline boy)

ps- My 100th post!! Yay!!


EDIT: I meant no offence Bonzo, I just thought it was funny

[This message has been edited by Faerus Stoneslammer (edited April 30, 2002).]

 

Stupid question of the year......

What is RAM?

I really have no idea. Any help and where I could find it would be nice help.

 

Random Access Memory

 

*******
DAY 16
*******

Jabba's Main Audience Chamber

The crowd of creepy courtiers parts as Han (blind) and Chewie are brought into the throne room, and other guards drag Luke up the steps.

"Han!" - Luke

"Luke!" - Han

"Are you all right?" - Luke

"Fine. Together again, huh?" - Han

"Wouldn't miss it." - Luke

"How are we doing?" - Han

"The same as always." - Luke

"That bad, huh? Where's Leia?" - Han

"I'm here." - Leia (annoyed)

Threepio is standing behind the grotesque gangster as he strokes Leia like a pet cat. Several of the guards, including Lando, bring Luke from the other side of the room. Boba is standing behind Jabba.

Threepio steps forward and translates for the captives.

"Oh, dear. His High Exaltedness, the great Jabba the Hutt, has decreed that you are to be terminated immediately." - C-3PO

"Good, I hate long waits." - Han

"You will then be taken to the Dune Sea and cast into the pit of Carkoon, the nesting place of the all-powerful Sarlacc." - C-3PO

"Doesn't sound so bad." - Han

"In his belly, you will find a new definition of pain and suffering, as you are slowly digested over a thousand years." - C-3PO

"On second thought, let's pass on that, huh?" - Han

Chewie barks his agreement.

"You should have bargained, Jabba. That's the last mistake you'll ever make." - Luke

<Insert deep Jabba laugh here, mixed with a Kowakian Monkey Lizard laugh>


**********
NEWSFLASH
**********

This week press screenings and exhibitor screenings of Attack of the Clones will start taking place all over the U.S. They will be happening until the week of the movie's release, so expect some advance word about the film to start leaking out soon.

I'm not talking Harry Knowles or 2nd draft script reviews here, I'm talking the real deal, final cut film.

Glad you like it Sorvo.

 

Thank you for answering that question.

 

Do you believe me if I say that I have seen the comic book version of the movie in the local supermarkets? I don't believe it myself...

Ara
(Who has a backache from Hell and other annoying distractions)

 

Actually Faerus that was a typo but i think i'll keep quiet and be sophisiticated and .. oh damm i've blown my cover as a sophisticated gent

On anothe note i have discovered that Butter should not be inserted into a drives and instead the 'eject' button should in fact be pressed. Don't make the same mistake as this cutomer:-

Customer: "I got this problem. You people sent me this install disk, and now my A: drive won't work."

Tech Support: "Your A drive won't work?"

Customer: "That's what I said. You sent me a bad disk, it got stuck in my drive, now it won't work at all."

Tech Support: "Did it not install properly? What kind of error messages did you get?"

Customer: "I didn't get any error message. The disk got stuck in the drive and wouldn't come out. So I got these pliers and tried to get it out. That didn't work either."

Tech Support: "You did what sir?"

Customer: "I got these pliers, and tried to get the disk out, but it wouldn't budge. I just ended up cracking the plastic stuff a bit."

Tech Support: "I don't understand sir, did you push the eject button?"

Customer: "No, so then I got a stick of butter and melted it and used a turkey baster and put the butter in the drive, around the disk, and that got it loose. I can't believe you would send me a disk that was broke and defective."

Tech Support: "Let me get this clear. You put melted butter in your A: drive and used pliers to pull the disk out?" At this point, I put the call on the speaker phone and motioned at the other techs to listen in.

Tech Support: "Just so I am absolutely clear on this, can you repeat what you just said?"

Customer: "I said I put butter in my A: drive to get your crappy disk out, then I had to use pliers to pull it out."

Tech Support: "Did you push that little button that was sticking out when the disk was in the drive, you know, the thing called the disk eject button?"

Silence. "Sir?"

Customer: "Yes."

Tech Support: "Sir, did you push the eject button?"

Customer: "No, but you people are going to fix my computer, or I am going to sue you for breaking my computer?"

Tech Support: "Let me get this straight. You are going to sue our company because you put the disk in the A: drive, didn't follow the instructions we sent you, didn't actually seek professional advice, didn't consult your user's manual on how to use your computer properly, instead proceeding to pour butter into the drive and physically rip the disk out?"

Customer: "Ummmm."

Tech Support: "Do you really think you stand a chance, since we do record every call and have it on tape?"

Customer: (now rather humbled) "But you're supposed to help!"

Tech Support: "I am sorry sir, but there is nothing we can do for you. Have a nice day."

 

/me rotflmfao

That was good Lazy, My uncle works for Tech support, and has gotten calls similar to that.

Not a problem DRSW I just happened to be the first to see it and post a responce.

/me still laughing at above post about butter in A Drive

 

*******
DAY 15
*******

Halfway through the countdown!!!

Coruscant, Senator Palpatine's Office

"...the Republic is not what it once was. The Senate is full of greedy, squabbling delegates. There is no interest in the common good...no civility, only politics. I must be frank, Your Majesty, there is little chance the Senate will act on the invasion." - Senator Palpatine

"Chancellor Valorum seems to think there is hope." - Queen Amidala

"If I may say so, Your Majesty, the Chancellor has little real power...he is mired down by baseless accusations of corruption. The bureaucrats are in charge now." - Senator Palpatine

"What options do we have?" - Queen Amidala

"Our best choice would be to push for the election of a stronger Supreme Chancellor. One who will take control of the bureaucrats. You could call for a vote of no confidence in Chancellor Valorum." - Senator Palpatine

"He has been our strongest supporter!?" - Queen Amidala

"Our only other choice would to be to submit a plea to the courts..." - Senator Palpatine

"There's no time for that. The courts take even longer to decide things than the Senate. Our people are dying, Senator. We must do something quickly to stop the Federation." - Queen Amidala

"To be realistic, Your Highness, I'd say we're going to have to accept Federation control for the time being." - Senator Palpatine

"That is something I cannot allow." - Queen Amidala


*****
Quiz
*****

Kudos to anyone who can figure out Palpatine's first name. Hint: it's alluded to above. (don't think serious and you might get it)

 

This is just to dilute the PFRB,PWSS, so that there will be safe amount of Big B's, Alienboy's, FTS's, Bonzo's, and DRSW's posts.

Just kidding, y'all. (My Texan cousin uses that word perpetually. It's annoying.)

 

Once more i delve into the depths of tech support logs to bring you these

Tech Support: "Thank you for calling customer service, and how may I help you?"
Customer: "I can't get it to do."
Tech Support: "Excuse me, ma'am?"
Customer: "I can't get my Internet to do."
Tech Support: "Let's check your setup."
Customer: "Okey dokey."
Tech Support: "Are you at your desktop?"
Customer: "Yes."
Tech Support: "Do a double click on the 'My Computer' icon."
Customer: "I don't see that one."
Tech Support: "What screen are you on, and what does you desktop look like?"
Customer: "Wood."
Tech Support: "What's on your screen, ma'am?"
Customer: "A bunch of names."
Tech Support: "Like what?"
Customer: "Bill, George, Larry, Jim."
Tech Support: "What screen are you on?"
Customer: "I am on the one I'm on. I need to go get my daughter. She's the computer guru of the family."
Tech Support: "Great, thank you."
April: "Hi, I'm April, and you are?"
Tech Support: "Mike."
April: "Mike. Cool, dude."
Tech Support: "Are you at your desktop?"
April: "You will have to excuse my mother. She's a little dense."
Tech Support: "No problem."
April: "How old are you?"
Tech Support: "300 years old. I'm the 'Highlander.' Um, would you do a double click on the 'My Computer' icon?"
April: "Sorry, I don't see that one."
Tech Support: "What do you see?"
April: "Bill, George, Larry, and Jim."
Tech Support: "What version of Windows are you using?"
April: "Ninety-something I guess."
Tech Support: "Erm. Shut down the computer and reboot."
April: "Ok...." (pause) "Done."
Tech Support: "What does your screen say?
April: "Bill, Larry, Jim, Barbie, and Wimper."
Tech Support: "Just for kicks, do a double click on 'Bill,' and see what happens."
April: "What is this?"
Tech Support: "What did it do?"
April: "It now has little folders: modems, devices, etc."
Tech Support: "Why was your 'My Computer' icon named Bill?"
April: "I wanted to name it something cute. Did I screw up?"


"I try to avoid using Microsoft. That's why I use MS-DOS."

A customer called saying he was getting an error in Windows 95. He told me what the error was, and I recognized this as a typical error that occurs after installing MS Office 97.

Tech Support: "Sir, did you just install Office 97?"
Customer: "YOU'RE IN MY COMPUTER, AREN'T YOU?????" (click)


Tech Support: "What seems to be the problem?"
Customer: "When I change my font sizes, the letters change size."

Tech Support: "No, sir...clicking on 'Remember Password' will NOT help you remember your password."


Customer: "Look, look!!!!! Look what it's doing!!! Can you BELIEVE this?? Why is it doing that??"
Tech Support: "Sir, I can't see your computer, what is it doing?"
Customer: "WHAT??? Can't you figure it out?? LOOK AT MY COMPUTER SCREEN!!!!! You can see it, can't you?!"

Tech Support: "Thank you for calling. How can I help you?"
Customer: "Help!"
Tech Support: "What's the problem, sir?"
Customer: "My drive started making funny noises, so I put my finger in it to see what was wrong, and now I CAN'T GET IT OUT!!"


Customer: "My system's on fire. What do I do?"

Customer: "My terminal is smoking and shooting sparks. Should I unplug it?"

Tech Support: "Hello, tech support, may I help you?"
Customer: (in a thick Russian accent) "Yes. Monitor is working fine but has sparks and smoke flying out back. Is ok?"
Tech Support: (blink)

Tech Support: "All right. Now click 'OK'."
Customer: "Click 'OK'?"
Tech Support: "Yes, click 'OK'."
Customer: "Click 'OK'?"
Tech Support: "That's right. Click 'OK'."
Customer: "So I click 'OK', right?"
Tech Support: "Right. Click 'OK'."
Pause.
Customer: "I clicked 'Cancel'."
Tech Support: "YOU CLICKED 'CANCEL'???"
Customer: "That's what I was supposed to do, right?"
Tech Support: "No, you were supposed to click 'OK'."
Customer: "I thought you said to click 'Cancel'."
Tech Support: "NO. I said to click 'OK'."
Customer: "Oh."
Tech Support: "Now we have to start over."
Customer: "Why?"
Tech Support: "Because you clicked 'Cancel'."
Customer: "Wasn't I supposed to click 'Cancel'?"
Tech Support: "No. Forget that. Let's start from the top."
Customer: "Ok."
I spent the next fifteen minutes re-constructing the carefully crafted setup for this lady's unique computer.

Another long post

 

How many people call asking about sparks flying out of thier computer?

I know I have stupid questions about my computer but thats just common sence to pull the plug!