Post for random babbling, possibly with some sense, #3

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Tal: My friends cousin sent me 6 .txts of funny things she'd found on various sites. I just compiled the gud'uns and wrote the intro then posted it here.

 

*******
DAY 10
*******

Death Star, Detention Block

Luke and Leia crouch together in an alcove for protection as they continue to exchange fire with troops. Han and Chewbacca are barely able to keep the stormtroopers at bay at the far end of the hallway. The laserfire is very intense, and smoke fills the narrow cell corridor. Everyone has to yell to be heard.

"There isn't any other way out." - Luke

"I can't hold them off forever! Now what?" - Han

"This is some rescue. When you came in here, didn't you have a plan for getting out?" - Leia

(pointing to Luke) "He's the brains, sweetheart." - Han

"Well, I didn't..." - Luke

The princess grabs Luke's gun and fires at a small grate in the wall next to Han, almost frying him.

"What the hell are you doing?" - Han

"Somebody has to save our skins. Into the garbage chute, fly boy." - Leia

She jumps through the narrow opening as Han and Chewbacca look on in amazement. Chewbacca sniffs the garbage chute and says something.

"Get in there you big furry oaf! I don't care what you smell!" - Han

Han gives him a kick and the Wookiee disappears into the tiny opening. Luke and Han continue firing as they work their way toward the opening.

"Wonderful girl! Either I'm going to kill her or I'm beginning to like her. Get in there!" - Han

Luke ducks laserfire as he jumps into the darkness. Han fires off a couple of quick blasts creating a smokey cover, then slides into the chute himself and is gone.

DEATH STAR -- GARBAGE ROOM.

Han tumbles into the large room filled with garbage and muck. Luke is already stumbling around looking for an exit. He finds a small hatchway and struggles to get it open. It won't budge.

"Oh! The garbage chute was a really wonderful idea. What an incredible smell you've discovered! Let's get out of here! Get away from there..." - Han

"No! wait!" - Luke

Han draws his laser pistol and fires at the hatch. The laserbolt ricochets wildly around the small metal room. Everyone dives for cover in the garbage as the bolt explodes almost on top of them.

"Will you forget it? I already tried it. It's magnetically sealed!" - Luke

"Put that thing away! You're going to get us all killed." - Leia

"Absolutely, Your Worship. Look, I had everything under control until you led us down here. You know, it's not going to take them long to figure out what happened to us." - Han

"It could be worse..." - Leia

A loud, horrible, inhuman moan works its way up from the murky depths. Chewbacca lets out a terrified howl and begins to back away. Han and Luke stand fast with their laser pistols drawn. The Wookiee is cowering near one of the walls.

"It's worse." - Han

"There's something alive in here!" - Luke

"That's your imagination." - Han

"Something just moves past my leg! Look! Did you see that?" - Luke

"What?" - Han

"Help!" - Luke

Suddenly Luke is yanked under the garbage.

"Luke! Luke! Luke?" - Han

Solo tries to get to Luke. Luke surfaces with a gasp of air and thrashing of limbs. A membrane tentacle is wrapped around his throat.

"Luke!" - Leia

Leia extends a long pipe toward him.

"Luke, Luke, grab a hold of this." - Leia

"Blast it, will you! My gun's jammed." - Luke (gasping)

"Where?" - Han

"Anywhere! Oh!!" - Luke

Han fires his gun downward. Luke is pulled back into the muck by the slimy tentacle.

"Luke! Luke!" - Han

Suddenly the walls of the garbage receptacle shudder and move in a couple of inches. Then everything is deathly quiet.

Han and Leia give each other a worried look as Chewbacca howls in the corner. With a rush of bubbles and muck Luke suddenly bobs to the surface.

"Grab him!" - Leia

Luke seems to be released by the dianoga.

"What happened?" - Leia

"I don't know, it just let go of me and disappeared..." - Luke

"I've got a very bad feeling about this." - Han

Before anyone can say anything the walls begin to rumble and edge toward the Rebels.

"The walls are moving!" - Luke

"Don't just stand there. Try to brace it with something." - Leia

They place poles and long metal beams between the closing walls, but they are simply snapped and bent as the giant trashmasher rumbles on. The situation doesn't look too good.

"Wait a minute!" - Luke

Luke pulls out his comlink.

"Threepio! Come in Threepio! Threepio! Where could he be?" - Luke

DEATH STAR -- MAIN GANTRY -- COMMAND OFFICE.

A soft buzzer and the muted voice of Luke calling out for See-Threepio can be heard on Threepio's hand comlink, which is sitting on the deserted computer console. Artoo and Threepio are nowhere in sight. Suddenly there is a great explosion and the door of the control tower flies across the floor. Four armed stormtroopers enter the chamber.
(WHILE THE RIGHTMOST TROOPER BANGS HIS HELMET ON THE DOORWAY )

"Take over!" - First Trooper

A trooper pushes a button and the supply cabinet door slides open. See-Threepio and Artoo-Detoo are inside. Artoo follows his bronze companion out into the office.

"They're madmen! They're heading for the prison level. If you hurry, you might catch them." - C-3PO

"Follow me! You stand guard." - First Trooper (to his troops)

The troops hustle off down the hallway, leaving a guard to watch over the command office.

"Come on!" -C-3PO (to R2-D2, grabs comlink)

The guard aims a blaster at them.

"Oh! All this excitement has overrun the circuits of my counterpart here. If you don't mind, I'd like to take him down to maintenance." - C-3PO

"All right." - Trooper

DEATH STAR -- GARBAGE ROOM.

As the walls rumble close, the room gets smaller and smaller. Chewie is whining and trying to hold a wall back with his giant paws. Han is leaning back against the other wall. Garbage is snapping and popping. Luke is trying to reach Threepio.

"Threepio! Come in, Threepio! Threepio!" - Luke

Han and Leia try to brace the contracting walls with a pole. Leia begins to sink into the trash.

"Get to the top!" - Han

"I can't!" - Leia

"Where could he be? Threepio! Threepio, will you come in?" - Luke

DEATH STAR -- MAIN FORWARD BAY -- SERVICE PANEL

"They aren't here! Something must have happened to them. See if they've been captured." - C-3PO

Little Artoo carefully plugs his claw arm into a new wall socket and a complex array of electronic sounds spew from the tiny robot.

"Hurry!" - C-3PO

DEATH STAR -- GARBAGE ROOM.

The walls are only feet apart. Leia and Han are braced against the walls.

"One thing's for sure. We're all going to be a lot thinner! Get on top of it!" - Han

"I'm trying!" - Leia

DEATH STAR -- MAIN FORWARD BAY -- SERVICE PANEL.

"Thank goodness, they haven't found them! Where could they be?" - C-3PO

Artoo frantically beeps something to See-Threepio.

"Use the comlink? Oh, my! I forgot I turned it off!" - C-3PO

DEATH STAR -- GARBAGE ROOM.

Meanwhile, Luke is lying on his side, trying to keep his head above the rising ooze. Luke's comlink begins to buzz and he rips it off his belt.

DEATH STAR -- MAIN FORWARD BAY -- SERVICE PANEL.

Muffled sounds of Luke's voice over the comlink can be heard, but not distinctly.

"Are you there, sir?" - C-3PO

DEATH STAR -- GARBAGE ROOM.

"Threepio!" - Luke

DEATH STAR -- MAIN FORWARD BAY -- SERVICE PANEL.

"We've had some problems..." - C-3PO

(over comlink) "Will you shut up and listen to me? Shut down all garbage mashers on the detention level, will you? Do you copy?" - Luke

(again over comlink) "Shut down all the garbage mashers on the detention level!" - Luke

"No. Shut them all down! Hurry!" - C-3PO (to R2-D2)

(R2-D2 is successful, and the walls stop. Han, Luke and Leia cheer)

Threepio holds his head in agony as he hears the incredible screaming and hollering from Luke's comlink.

"Listen to them! They're dying, Artoo! Curse my metal body! I wasn't fast enough. It's all my fault!" - C-3PO

*****************************
A long one, but a good one

 

Got myself the Episode II soundtrack. Love it!

Also, I finally got the black elbow-length gloves I have been wanting to get for the last eight montths! Yay!

Damn the Swedish Ice Hockey team.

Ara
(Coherence is overrated)

 

Bank holdiday weekends are supposed to be for fun! Yet I've spent more time working than I normally do at school!

Homework is a struggle to finish, not a learning experience.

 

EX, GET YERRIL!!!

(Two extra days of vacation. Mwa ha ha!! ....)

[This message has been edited by Tiamat (edited May 06, 2002).]

 

I'm back! Had a good time... The french weren't too rude Xenecor.... And the wine tasted well

Tiamat... you lucky bastard!

When is the concert?!

 

Tia, if I wasn't such a gentleman and so madly in love with you , I would call you a traitorous wench!

 

Big B, you perhaps did watched Space Balls although I doubt that, but have you seen this one?
http://www.asciimation.co.nz/

Disclaimer: only for SW cultists!

 

/me cries out loud!

It is so close to finals and I can't get into chat room for my moringing laughs and diversions!!!

I might go insane! Oh wait, maybe I already have.

Mmmwaaaahaaaa

 

Are you in your right mind!

he he

- "No actually I'm in my left"

 

Love that ASCII Extremist! Helluva lot of effort in that one.

 

Joacqin, did you have a look at the site, apparantly, he started in 1997! Lol, poor guy.

 

I'm getting a new washer! WooHoo! Now I can stop wearing the same stuff and where new clean clothes that smell nice

 

I have lost my interest in posting stuff. scary.

 

******
DAY 9
******

(one of my most favorite SW moments...)

Swamps of Dagobah

Luke's face is upside-down and showing enormous strain. He stands on his hands, with Yoda perched on his feet. Opposite Luke and Yoda are two rocks the size of bowling balls. Luke stares at the rocks and concentrates. One of the rocks lifts from the ground and floats up to rest on the other.

"Use the Force. Yes..." - Yoda

Yoda taps Luke's leg. Quickly, Luke lifts one hand from the ground. His body wavers, but he maintains his balance. Artoo, standing nearby, is whistling and beeping frantically.

"Now...the stone. Feel it." - Yoda

Luke concentrates on trying to lift the top rock. It rises a few feet, shaking under the strain. But, distracted by Artoo's frantic beeping, Luke loses his balance and finally
collapses. Yoda jumps clear.

"Concentrate!" - Yoda

Annoyed at the disturbance, Luke looks over at Artoo, who is rocking urgently back and forth in front of him. Artoo waddles closer to Luke, chirping wildly, then scoots over the edge of the swamp. Catching on, Luke rushes to the water's edge. The X-wing fighter has sunk, and only the tip of its nose shows above the lake's surface.

"Oh, no. We'll never get it out now." - Luke

"So certain are you. Always with you it cannot be done. Hear you nothing that I say?" - Yoda

Luke looks uncertainly out at the ship.

"Master Yoda, moving stones around is one thing. This is totally different." - Luke

"No! No different! Only different in your mind. You must unlearn what you have learned." - Yoda

"All right, I'll give it a try." - Luke

"No! Try not. Do. Or do not. There is no try." - Yoda

Luke closes his eyes and concentrates on thinking the ship out. Slowly, the X-wing's nose begins to rise above the water. It hovers for a moment and then slides back, disappearing once again.

"I can't. It's too big." - Luke (panting)

"Size matters not. Look at me. Judge me by my size, do you? Hm? Mmmm." - Yoda

Luke shakes his head.

"And well you should not. For my ally in the Force. And a powerful ally it is. Life creates it, makes it grow. It's energy
surrounds us and binds us. Luminous beings are we..." (Yoda pinches Luke's shoulder) "...not this crude matter. You must feel the Force around you. Here, between you...me...the tree...the rock...everywhere! Yes, even between this land and that ship!" - Yoda

"You want the impossible." - Luke

Quietly Yoda turns toward the X-wing fighter. With his eyes closed and his head bowed, he raises his arm and points at the
ship. Soon, the fighter rises above the water and moves forward as Artoo beeps in terror and scoots away. The entire X-wing moves majestically, surely, toward the
shore. Yoda stands on a tree root and guides the fighter carefully down toward the beach.
Luke stares in astonishment as the fighter settles down onto the shore. He walks toward Yoda.

"I don't...I don't believe it." - Luke

"That is why you fail." - Yoda


*******************
Cool Arabwel, I am listening to it right now too - Love Pledge and the Arena, a great track!

 

Big B, any reasion you dont have all these SW posts in their own topic? I'm surprised no one has really said anything. But the whole up side is that their cool to read.

 

Life sucks. I want to be a lich.

FLOPPY DISKS ARE EVIL!!!!!!!!!

Ara
(Trying to refrain from cryushing every single floppy she has in frustration)

 

You may corruptive Floppies, i got one in a stack of 'em

My parents said I had to get out more, the one time I get to go out, they say no

 

Extremist ... how did it feel locking up your first thread? Did the power thrill you? Did it tantalize you, making you want to lock more?

Beware!
Power corrupts.
Absolute power corrupts absolutely!

[Nah, locking is not so tantalizing, the thrilling part is this ability to edit -Ex]

[This message has been edited by Extremist (edited May 07, 2002).]

 

******
DAY 8
******

Death Star, Endor, and the Rebel Fleet

"All wings report in." - Lando

"Red Leader standing by." - Wedge

"Gray Leader standing by." - Gray Leader

"Green Leader standing by." - Green Leader

"Lock S-foils in attack positions." - Wedge

REBEL STAR CRUISER - BRIDGE

From the bridge of the Rebel Headquarters Frigate, Admiral Ackbar watches the fighters massing outside his viewscreen.

"May the Force be with us." - Ackbar

MILLENNIUM FALCON - COCKPIT

Lando looks worriedly at his alien copilot, Nien Nunb, who points to the control panel and talks to Lando.

"We've got to be able to get some kind of a
reading on that shield, up or down. Well, how
could they be jamming us if they don't know
if we're coming?" - Lando

Lando shoots a concerned look out at the approaching Death Star as the implications of what he's just said sink in. He hits a
switch on his comlink.

"Break off the attack! The shield is still up." - Lando

"I get no reading. Are you sure?" - Wedge (comlink)

"Pull up! All craft pull up!" - Lando

The Falcon turns hard to the left. Out the window the stars and the Death Star move off right. The Falcon and the fighters of Red Squad veer off desperately to avoid the unseen wall.

REBEL STAR CRUISER - BRIDGE

Alarms are screaming and lights flashing as the huge ship changes course abruptly. Other ships in the fleet shoot by outside as the
armada tries to halt its forward momentum.

"Take evasive action! Green Group, stick close to holding sector MV-7." - Ackbar

A Mon Calamari controller turns away from his screen and calls out to Ackbar, quite excited. The Admiral rushes over to the
controller.

"Admiral, we have enemy ships in sector 47." - Controller

On the screen can be seen the moon, Death Star, and the massive Imperial fleet. Ackbar moves to the comlink.

"It's a trap!" - Ackbar

"Fighters coming in." - Lando (comlink)

The Millennium Falcon and several squads of Rebel fighters head into an armada of TIE fighters. The sky explodes as a fierce
dogfight ensues in and around the giant Rebel cruisers.

"There's too many of them!" - Rebel Pilot

"Accelerate to attack speed! Draw their fire
away from the cruisers." - Lando

"Copy, Gold Leader." - Wedge

DEATH STAR - EMPEROR'S THRONE ROOM

Through the round window behind the Emperor's throne can be seen the distant flashes of the space battle in progress.

"Come, boy. See for yourself." - Emperor Palpatine

The Emperor is sitting in his throne, with Vader standing at his side. Luke moves to look through a small section of the window.

"From here you will witness the final destruction of the Alliance, and the end of
your insignificant Rebellion." - Emperor Palpatine

Luke is in torment. He glances at his lightsaber sitting on the armrest of the throne. The Emperor watches him and smiles,
touches the lightsaber.

"You want this, don't you? The hate is
swelling in you now. Take your Jedi weapon.
Use it. I am unarmed. Strike me down with it.
Give in to your anger. With each passing
moment, you make yourself more my servant." - Emperor Palpatine

Vader watches Luke in his agony.

"No!" - Luke

"It is unavoidable. It is your destiny. You,
like your father, are now mine!" - Emperor Palpatine

*********************
Here's a couple of cool links for the day:

one highschool is getting in the SW spirit

and

a nifty CNN article

Also, DRSW, just be glad I decided to restrain myself and start counting down at 30 days instead of 50

[This message has been edited by Big B (edited May 08, 2002).]