Real Fight Club

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It's a scare tactic, shralp! Yeah, that's it... A scare tactic! I promise!!

No! I really mean it!

No! Please don't hurt me!!!!

<Falstaff turns and heads for the hills - quickly>

 

I would be the unbeaten champion of this fight club with my Nin-Jitsu tactics. And if that doesn't work I'll start singing, nobody who has heard me sing, survived.

That reminds me Ragusa -> Weaseling out of things is important to learn. It's what separates us from the animals... except the weasel.

 

I will destroy you interlopers with my prehensile and immaculately hygenic feet!

 

Ummm, okay...

 

I've always thought that grappling fighting looks an awful lot like hugging. Just thought I'd throw some gas onto the fire.

 

Yeah, practicing in my living room with one roommate always made the other roommate giggle.

That homophobe.

 

Isn't the first two rules of Fight Club not to talk about Fight Club. But anyways me and my friends have had our own version of Fight Club ever sense we've seen the movie. At least once a week we box all out (except for the nuts) and we have a blast. The first one to quit or fall to the ground loses. I'm not that good at boxing but I have more fun the more I am getting beat the crap out of me. As you have noticed one of the things we changed about our Fight Club is we don't have to keep it a secret.

 

I will destroy you interlopers with my prehensile and immaculately hygenic member!

 

Not if we chop it off...

 

Can I use Monkey Island insults??

 

Hehe this reminds me of the time i was fighting (grappling, no striking but no proper rules) with this guy who's 2 years older than me, about 4 stone heavier and about 4-6 inches taller. He also does judo and is either the top belt or the one below it. He has one a couple of competitions too. Im the complete oposite - small, light and the only vaguely martial arts i've ever done is fencing. At two parties we've faced off for a laugh 2 times. The first time was on a trampoline with first one to hit the floor with shoulder (wrestling style) wins. I won. The second was on bouncy castle where he tried to throw me to the ground but i managed to drive him into the bouncy wall. Unfortunately this nearly knocked the castle over :S

The only reason that many people consider me to be a good fighter was that i was physicaly and mentally bullied for 3 years at my primary school. This gave me an extremely high pain tolerance and a very good knowledge of how to fight (i've been on the recieving end of a hell of a lot). I also can do almost any move from most fighting styles after seeing it between one and 3 times. My own personal way of fighting generally involves the fact that when i go down i bounce back up and my incredibly high jump - i can jump on to peoples backs and take them down very quickly. I am also very good at holds - i put one of my friends in a wrist hold without ever being taught how to and that certainly stopped him from attacking me.

Well that's my story.

 

I bet $10 that LB beats Shralp

 

A million bucks says we will all be to drunk to fight properly, and someone will end up mooning the old folk's home, or wizzing out of the window on the top floor of a block of flats...

 

*Drunk..?*

*Noble turns his attention towards this rambling mob for a while.*

You need a bar with that garage Shralp? I'll gladly be the barkeep. Income goes to you.

[ November 11, 2002, 00:07: Message edited by: Nobleman ]

 

What income??

oh
..
..
Ill just bring my own Dutch booz

!beer heineken

 

Ok, we've got $10 for Lazy Bonzo. Now who wants to back the home-town favorite? C'mon. I'm offering 3:1 here!

(Always be suspicious of a fighter who acts as his own bookie.)

 

anyone heard of ultimate wrestling (or ultimate fighting, whatever it's called)??? As in the one where it's like a royal rumble with a master from each martial art. The only rules - no fish hooks and no hits to the groin.

A friend of mine was telling me about it. Sounds pretty savage to me.

 

Bah, all talk and no action.

And whichever of you it was calling Judo sissy, I'd be happy to give you a proper introduction to it. Believe me, you won't think of it as sissy after that. There's a lot more in it aside from throws.

 

Judo = sissy!

Yeah, I've got Jigoro Kano's book. It's got stuff in it. But no judo sissy has ever beaten Brazilian jiu-jitsu when it comes to NHB fighting.

I've watched almost all of the Ultimate Fighting Championships. It was ok when it was actually fighting. But now they've added all these rules about how long you can be in the guard, no groin shots, etc. It's no longer real, which was the only thing interesting about UFC.

[Edit:] Oh, and they don't do the "one guy from each martial art" thing anymore... for the reason above. The jiu-jitsu guys kept cleaning house.

Also, I'm just joking about judo guys being sissies. I don't think it's as effective as jiu-jitsu, SOMBO, or shootfighting, but it is fun and useful.

[ November 11, 2002, 15:11: Message edited by: Shralp ]

 

i got the impression it was always the guys that could do grappling and getting on a submission hold that nearly always won, and the kick boxers who were always out first (coz they go in guns blazing, as it were).

No, Judo is not for sissies. I used to do it a way back but i couldn't handle it. One decent hard throw i couldn't think properly for the next hour coz my head was caned. Opted for karate instead (but went to a club that did Aikido as well, so got training in some of both styles).