Relationship Rant Thread #5

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Instant grounds for dumping. Move out!

Hahaha, that gave me a good chuckle.

 

He bought my a turkish delight bar, so I'll let him off... this time

 

TURKISH DELIGHT!

That's what the white witch used to woo Edward (I think). Oh, this is a bad omen, very bad.

 

And what another Witch has used to woo her Salamander

What's your point?

Will be a year together in two weeks and two days. We'll probably have to celebrate on the Friday beforehand again as Sal works weekends.

 

Bad influence? Nah. I think that you have a little bit of a Taken chick magnet dark side. For a second, let's change the story a bit and presume she has someone - now she's all over you. The singles don't give a damn about you, but when it comes to the taken ones, you suddenly become hot stuff.

Welcome to my world... whenever you like it or not.

As for the record - [censored] the record. I hate that expression!

 

Umm... a lot has happened, but I don't feel like really explaining.

Suffice to say that we went on a date and it was pretty good (ice skating and dinner/breakfast at Denny's), of course it was with her boyfriends permission (and kind of a joke)... It's a long story, and I don't feel like typing it out right now, but if anyone wants to hear I could, lol.

The weird thing is that when she asked if we could go on a date her boyfriend said yes, since we are friends and he'd just think of it as us hanging out. She then proceeded to explain to him that there was a difference between a date and hanging out, and that on a date there is some interests in more than friendship... That's what confused me.

Blah... it's all confusing to me. And really weird to explain.

 

OK my girlfriend has a fookin ANNOYING best mate, and she's getting in the way... this is causing problems! I had a go at my lass last night over her mate, and I'm being really funny with her because I'm annoyed.. grrrr!

I can see this coming to an 'it's me, or her' situation before long.. I can't stand her mate one bit! She a dick and only has 1 friend... my gf... there's a reason she's only got one friend, because she's a pain in the arse! Because my gf is her only friend, she only ever asks her to go out, cos she got noone else... then, her mate doesn't like me being there! She doesn't like the fact my girl has a boyfriend and she doesn't... She's proper getting in the way and it's pissing me off.

 

And now for suspicious timing... I think they broke up a day or two after our "date." Thing is, the guy is still friendly to me (since we're friends) and the girl is slightly less... maybe. I dunno I'm bad at reading these things. Ugh we will see.

 

Maybe she was expecting you to explain to him it was a date as well
He may be being dense about it and not getting the hint

Sal has gone off to work in his home town again. So I'm home alone all weekend.

I've been feeling so rough lately on all three levels I cna't help but feel I'm drifting apart from him. I love him with all my heart and he's the most important thing in the world to me, but after recent... discussions... I'm not sure what he wants of me anymore.

He used to say so much about what he wanted us to do together in the future... one by one those are all being taken away. Lies just to keep me happy.

It's our anniversary in a week (the 23rd) and a week ago I would have been really excited... I just don't know where we're going now, or if we are.

He's already admitted he wouldn't be man enough to say if he was fed up or bored with me. I waited three weeks for my last boyfriend to finally dump me after obviously avoiding me for said three weeks. I don't want the same to happen this time, because I don't think I'll see it coming.

Ugh, I'm hoping the medication, illness, tiredness, hormones and gods knows what else is just making me miserable and paranoid for no reason. I'm just sick of having every hope and plan being taken away because someone else has decided to change the tune.

 

Ugh, this sucks, peeps. Sorry to hear it, darlin. I hope you get the answers you're after.

 

Don't worry it's natural to feel like that, especially when you're apart. It doesn't mean the relationship is falling to bits. Relationships don't keep their initial lovely-doveyness forever, you reach a point where you're so comfortable with each other you don't feel the need to. He's with you for a reason and that's what you've got to remind yourself. It's not going to do any good to sit and stew on it all the time though, because he when he comes back you'll be a bit funny with him, which will create it's own problems. Go out with your mates or something, get mashed, take your mind off it or you might end up creating a problem that wasn't there in the 1st place. Really hope it works out for you 8people. I like you.

 

Thanks for the replies guys, they've made me feel better.

We're absolutely fine around each other, and nothing has *really* changed between us. Last week Sal was working in Basingstoke and I was really looking forward to seeing him, he came home all smiling and joking and being a bit daft, so I responded in kind.

Then he's telling me off for being childish all the time and saying how annoying I am. That I don't know when to stop and it's obvious when I should he admitted he doesn't want to live with me next year, which we were planning to do THIS year for the most part. (We're three rooms apart in student residences this year.) I asked if he was fed up with me, he says he's not - also admitted he wouldn't be man enough to say if he was when I pushed him further.

I don't like how there always has to be a snapping point before he comes out with everything wrong all at once. Whenever he's miserable it's inevitable I'll be in the firing range. Which is generally when there's a change in environment (moving to uni was snappy), when he's coming down from caffeine (quite often) or if he's had ice cream (he's a right bastard then. An intolerance we think.)

I think half the trouble is he doesn't seem to get that I'm autistic (Aspergers Syndrome, plus a few minor conditions on the same scale) So whenever I miss something "obvious" it can be quite hurtful. For example we were talking about friends we had during each school phase, I admitted I only really got friends in secondary school and university and got bullied a lot in other schools. His response?
"Well you obviously didn't try hard enough then"
I went to sleep on the sofa after that, but he came down and got me.

 

I'm the same. Every guy I know is the same. We tend to brush feelings under the carpet and pretend they are not there. We don't like talking about how we feel. I'll do anything for an easy life, to avoid talking about my feeligns and avoid arguments... but then if I'm tired or in a bad mood and something annoys me, it alls comes spilling at once. It's a bloke thing, don't worry about it.

 

Men.........should all be shot.........maybe not...........ho-hum

 

Uhh, Barms, I'll have to chime in favor of the other camp here -- I, for one, always believed that dealing with things as they happen is the best way to go. The proof of concept would be my 4+ years relationship which applied the said philosophy. To pull an 8peeps, a summer storm happens to clear the air so fairer weather can continue. A storm at the wrong place and wrong moment, that's when the damage occurs. I believe peeps's current situation is a perfect proof-of-concept.

That being said, I hope things work out for the best, peeps, whatever the best may be.

 

We've had a chat. Outcome is I'm going to try my best to be less venomous and he's going to try and lash out at me less.

So we'll see how things go

At least we've cleared the air before our anniversary. I need to go into town and get him the rest of his present. First anniversary is paper/clocks so I've got him one of each.

He's also going to help me cheer up when he gets home. I've had a pretty bad lapse past few days which just made me distant and easily upset. Hopefully it will pass quickly. I haven't had a proper lapse like this in just about a year

 

Good luck with it!

 

I know this is inappropriate, hurtful and other mean things, but I just cannot resist it.

This thread makes me so much happier to be where I am, alone 'til I feel I'm ready.

Sure loneliness bites but it isn't half as bad compared to the pain of a bad relationship.

 

amen to that. been single for just over a year now after coming from an almost 6 year relationship. you have bad days now and again, but them's the breaks