Relationship Rant Thread #5

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Well when you put it that way, I guess the most obvious avenue open to you is a straight-up "confrontation" type conversation. I'm not saying you should "lay all your problems out" like a lot of women usually do, but choose a time when neither of you are angry or anything then talk about it. I advise this because if you do this while you're angry, it may just turn into one of those "arguments" and she'll probably take it more seriously because its not just something said in anger or the heat of the moment.

 

Yeah.

I'd say sweet, caring, loyal. Loyal to people, loyal to principles... you get the drill.

 

They oughtn't be too sweet. I have met a couple of sweet girls who were disappointingly boring in all their sweetness. For better or worse, so far I appear to have a fondness for girls with little quirks.

And pleeease ... loyalty is sort of self evident, much like 'caring yet strong enough to stand up to me and put me in my place when necessary'. So she should have the good sense of only putting you in your place when necessary, meaning, you want no harpy? I mean, I beg you, who in his right mind would want a disloyal, bi-polar (unpredictably switching between eager-to-please- and harpy-mode) ogre for a girlfriend?

 

"I do like sweet, nice and caring gals."

S-s-s-s-stereotype.

What about that other type of woman: strong, self-confident (except perhaps a bit shy in matters of the heart), slightly crazy, not overly demonstrative of their affections, but essentially very caring, independent, with a sense of humour and...will definitely stand up to you.

You know you love us unconventional woe-men.

 

Perfect... absolutely PERFECT!

You don't happen to know someone like that, would you? I'd marry her on the spot.

Abso-f******-lutely.

 

Same. But that's probably because sweetness is sometimes a pose. If you were to find an infinitely caring person without quirks, I doubt she'd be boring.

Guess. Some people are put off by loyalty and some rule it impossible.

Personally, I always value those women who stick by their word and who act honourably. Honour is not something which is only for men.

Note that honour precludes being sweet at times.

 

I actually met this type of woman the other day...the trouble is that usually the chances of ending up together with these are equivalent of the chances of survival of a paper-mouse in inferno chased by asbestos-cats. Turned out I was right and wrong at the same time. Mutual attraction, yes. But a relationship? No. Not in a million years, and here's me saying this while hoping her to prove me wrong.

I guess I'm an easy comfort, a small victory, an ego boost for women that seem to need that. They might be strong but they like to be stronger. Getting me to fall for them is a means to an end, they accomplish something, they like to win me over because I might seem to be hard to get and when they've won me over the thrill is over.

Oh well, I'll be seeing her once more I guess, but I'm expecting it to be a courtesy call. We'll meet since I have the feeling that she thinks that it's polite to do so. We'll meet because I think it will be interesting enough and because there's a chance that I could get to know her better. I'd like to be a friend for her but I fear that things have gone a little too far for things to be comfortable for that. Good thing that I'm not a stranger to awkward situations...

 

Iku-Turso, if that's any consolation, I have that problem too - keeping someone, providing the constant incentive to stay, is not easy. In fact, attracting someone's attention to such an avail that he or she would want a relationship - and I mean seriously, not just for looks or other hots - is already difficult. Keeping is even more so.

 

What do you do when you start having feelings again for a best-friend you thought you were over?

 

Live on and try not to think about it? Remind myself of the reasons it's no more?

 

@Dalveen: Start flagellating yourself?

 

Very tempting Iku. Suppose i will just grin and bear it, like i did last time, just got to hope it doesnt get to hard.

 

Or tell her?

 

"It?"

 

And I was wondering what an accountant was doing in a relationship thread.

 

Telling her would just make things akward, she has enough crap in her life without having to deal with that. Especially since im "the only thing keeping her sane".

 

That's creepy. Really creepy. Nothing wrong in being clingy (to a reasonable degree, at least), but this is plain scary.

 

DotW, if you'd had the year she had, you'd be insane.

 

Well then, keep her sane...

Here's how it goes: You get to be there for her. You get to comfort her. And if you do that and expect nothing in return... well, that's something special. So be there for her...What more could you ask?

 

Sex is fun

That is all.

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