The Ashes Thread

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I love this quote from Gilchrist::

 

I wish England's underwear models would hurry up and finish this game off so I can go to bed. This is nowhere near as exciting as the last three games.

[ August 28, 2005, 16:18: Message edited by: Harbourboy ]

 

Underwear models? lol?

 

Oh. My. God.

Why do they do this to us? I've just got upstairs and wiped the finger-smears off my glasses, where I was hiding my head in my hands for passages of play as wickets were falling like Manchester rain.

But thank God for Matthew Hoggard. Bless 'im, he might look like he should be driving a tractor not playing professional sport, but that was an innings of such composure under extreme pressure (and a spanking 4 through extra cover) that it belied his status batting #9, especially when you consider some of the daft shots the batsmen played. Vaughan, Bell and Jones take note!

Well, after that pseudo-rant:
2-1 in the Ashes, baby! I don't think I've seen a test series where we've led the Aussies...

 

Yessss!

Get in there, well done Hoggy and Giles. Kept their heads when others lost theirs (Pieterson/Jones inparticular) just what we needed at the start it was good to see some common sense from the batsmen.

2-1, great stuff.

 

Great. Well done to the underwear boys for making it exciting AFTER I went to bed. I wrote the game off after Tait got out but I ended up missing the best part.

Oh well, I guess the result was never really in doubt. Not sure what Australia will do in the last game but I'm sure they need to try something different. They can't rely on Shane Warne to save the day (with bat and ball) and expect to come close to competing with England.

England fans must be especially pleased that they have managed to play so well and retain the same team for the whole series. In days gone by, England would be on to their 20th player by the time they got to the fourth test. But this team has had no injuries and no obvious weaknesses (other than the captain's dress-sense) so no team changes have been required.

3-1 series clean-up coming up.

 

I don't get the underwear thing, Gaz!

My, England don't half like to make me sweat, why don't we ever win the easy way? The bowling from Lee and Warne was very good though.

Australia today though I think showed why they have been such great champions for so many years. Such a great spirit.

Ponting and Kadditch didn't need to kick off like they did though. Especially Ponts, he let himself down a bit yesterday.

 

The only explanation that I can come up with for the ridiculous outfits worn by the likes of Michael Vaughan and Kevin Pietersen is that they have become sponsors for a new range of skin tight underwear. Why else would they show off their long sleeved lycra bodysuits under a short sleeved shirt? Why not go all the way and wear their Speedos outside their trousers and pretend to be Superman?

 

They're the all new muscle-warmer things! Also stop the guys from ripping their elbows to bits when they are diving for stops and catches. Everyone'll be catching on soon ad they'll become the norm. Where we go, others follow.

Vaughany swears by 'em!

... but yeah, they look like pricks.

 

Why don't they just wear long sleeved shirts like Geraint Jones does? He has to dive all over the place but you don't see him dressed up like some sort of gymnastics instructor.

And clearly, they do NOTHING to help with your catching skills, as Kevin Pietersen has aptly demonstrated.

Oh well, here's hoping for a close finish to Game 5 (maybe England having to bat all day to salvage a draw, 9 down with 5 overs to go or something, with Warne and McGrath bowling)

 

England's got one hand on the Ashes, and I sincerely doubt that Australia will stop them. Knowing that you only need a draw always brings out the worst in teams; hopefully England proves me wrong here (and tells Botham to jam his anti-competitive advice somewhere appropriate, the git).

The thing that strikes me the most about this series is that, although Australia has performed appallingly and are being outplayed by England, the two matches England has won have hardly been drubbings (2 runs and 3 wickets, respectively). The one Test they did dominate was rain-affected and was drawn, while the first Test was one-way traffic for Australia.

This last Test will be interesting. Irrespective of the result, it's been the most engaging Ashes series in twenty years, and it's dealt a fatal blow to the myth of Australian invincibility. About time, I suppose. We've had some shonky umpiring trip us up, but if we were really that good/that much better than England, it wouldn't matter. Generational change is due for the Aussies, and while it'll be sad to see players of McGrath and Warne's calibre going, they can't hold the team together forever.

I'm with HB on the wish list, although frankly, I'd prefer to see Australia decimate England in the last Test. But hey, I never said I was impartial...

 

I'd like to talk a bit about respect.

Im pretty sure the Aussies thought that Simon Jones and Matthew Hoggard would have been the weak link in the bowling attack, maybe NonSequitur could clarify this?

Anywho I've always had alot of respect for Warne in a talent an spoting sense, many people don't like him, but he's earned alot more respect for just that one moment, when he congratulated Freddie in the 2nd test.

Brett Lee has proved a brilliant sportsman and along with Warne has been a total credit to Australia, I hope he doesn't do something to ruin what he has built up over the tour.

However, Ponting has gone way down in my estimation, sure alot can be said in the heat of the moment, but he has gone too far on a few occasions.

The fact that we are going into the 5th test an in a situation where we can not lose the series; that's earne the team more respect. Now we just have to travel to India and Pakistan to prove we are the worlds best.

I have to say it's pleasing to have shut Magraa up. It's gone from a 0-5 whitewash to moaning about subs an trying to salvage a draw. Yum yum.

 

It's been the most engaging test series from any teams for years. And much more credit is due to England this time than the last time they won the Ashes because that Australian team from the mid 1980s was pretty useless compared to this one (Andrew Hilditch, Dirk Wellham, Dave Gilbert, Tim Zoehrer - not really in the same league as Glenn McGrath, Shane Warne, Justin Langer, and Adam Gilchrist)

My main regret is that Australia's decline really takes the gloss off the upcoming Super Series because now we know that the Rest of the World test team won't be taking on the best test team in the world so should clean up easily. Anything could happen in the one day series though.

 

Ashes averages with one test to play...

England:

Batting:

Marcus Trescothick 355runs@ ave 44.37
Kevin Pieterson 301@ 43.00
Freddie Flintoff 322 @ 40.25
Michael Vaughan 270 @ 33.75
Simon Jones 66 @ 33.00
Andrew Strauss 263 @ 32.87
Gerraint Jones 203 @ 29.00
Ian Bell 171 @ 21.37
Ashley Giles 64 @ 10.66
Steve Harmison 40 @ 8.00
Matthew Hoggard 39 @ 6.50

Bowling:

Simon Jones 18 wickets @ 21.00 runs a wicket
Steve Harmison 16 @ 28.87
Freddie Flintoff 19 @ 30.36
Matthew Hoggard 12 @ 31.23
Ashley Giles 10 @ 50.20

Austalia

Batting:

Ricky Ponting 324 @ 40.50
Michael Clarke 310 @ 38.75
Justin Langer 289 @ 36.12
Shane Warne 249 @ 31.12
Simon Katich 247 @ 30.87
Brett Lee 152 @ 30.40
Adam Gilchrist 158 @ 22.57
Matthew Hayden 180 @ 22.50
Damien Martyn 168 @ 21.00
Michael Kasprowicz 44 @ 11.00
Jason Gillespie 47 @ 7.83
Shaun Tait 7 @ 7
Glenn McGrath 36 @ ----- *Not been out so doesn't have an average yet*

Bowling:

Ricky Ponting 1 @ 9.00
Shane Warne 28 @ 19.67
Glenn McGrath 14 @ 20.21
Brett Lee 19 @ 33.68
Simon Katich 1 @ 36.00
Shaun Tait 3 @ 44.33
Michael Kasprowicz 4 @ 62.50
Jason Gillespie 3 @ 100.00

Make of this what you will.

----

This made me laugh as well... http://www.1889internet.co.uk/blog/mov01718.mpg
Well funny!

[ August 30, 2005, 22:19: Message edited by: Barmy Army ]

 

"Make of this what you will."

It's time we dropped Bell.

 

Nah, don't worry about Belly. He's one of the best fielders we have and his batting is improving. He's been a little unlucky, but he's working on softening his hands up. That's been his problem, he's being going at the ball with hard hands and getting edges. He'll be alright. He's our very own Jonty Rhodes! Great fielder at silly point, especially.

 

Bring back Gladstone Small!

 

It looks like Simon Jones might not be fit for the 5th test. This is a massive blow as he's probably been our best bowler of the series.
Because of this, there's a lot of speculation here about how will replace him. Chris Tremlett? The most promising youbng bowler on the county scene? Paul Collingwood? An extra competant batsman and a decentish bowler? Or, The Dazzler!! Darren Gough in one last final hoohah so end his career!
Give the Dazzler the nod I say. We have a great chance of winning the Ashes this year and if there's ever been one England player who deserved it but never got it, it's the Dazzler. Also, the Brucies are going to come at us like madmen, and he's one player that everyone knows will battle and not buckle.

I'd love to see him win the Ashes. But I'd love even more to see Simon Jones fit and playing!

PS - Jesus, how do you remember Gladstone Small? What a loser he was.

[ August 31, 2005, 23:53: Message edited by: Barmy Army ]

 

NZ beat Zimbabwe again last night but if I was Zimbabwe, I'd be a bit unhappy with that silly substitutes rule. They got ripped off because they chose a bowler as a sub, then lost the toss and had to bowl first. So their sub was wasted. It wasn't down to strategy but just bad luck on their part which gives an unfair advantage to the team that wins the toss. The sooner they get rid of that rule, the better.

 

I moaned about that as soon as it got brought in. It'd be a decent idea IF the captain could choose the sub after the toss has been made, instead of before.