The battle of Sorcerer's Place (SP fantasy)

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Harkle wakes up from coma, but he still feels very banged (Harkle lost 10 wisdom for 1 hour). Then Harkle sees that a spike has impaled his leg.

"Oh, damn. Now I can't walk. But I can crawl - like an ooze. Ooh, great idea!"

Harkle casts polymorph self - and tada - he's Mustard jelly.

"Shmfgh smmshp"

The slime moves towards Aikanaro and Gothmog.

 

Chevalier lifts his smooth long-fingered palm with visibly distended blue veins to cover his mouth while he is yawning. This very moment a young squire emerges and pulls his coat:

Master, there is a pit fiend over there says the squire.

'Yea, there is' says chevalier in his legendary half-yawning and stiff-upper lip hung-over accent, toying with an empty coffee mug and thinking that he is not going to don the stinking metal tin if he has anything to say in the matter.

'Master, you *must* do something'...

'I feel a great presence of force in you, but you're not a paladin yet'.

'My lord, you should go there and fight the daemon like in books'...

'You are young and have yet to learn much' chevalier pats the young squire on the shoulder in a fatherly fashion. 'See how things are done'.

Chevalier rises and turns his sight directly at the fiend despite the pain in his skull. The beast gazes at him in utmost anger and disbelief.

'Yes, I'm speaking to you. Chevalier uses Voice: 'Desere hoc locum. Reveni ad eum qui te arcesserit'.

As the daemon is being sucked in by the one-way interplanar portal and sonic vibration ceases, chevalier smiles at Rallymama.

'Master, do you really have to?' asks the squire, who knows that smile well. But chevalier is not there any more...

'Greetings, milady' he says to Rallymama prior to picking her from her seat. He carries her downstairs and throws her into the shallow pond. With his best smile he extends his arm in Rallymama's direction in order to help her to get out of the water. 'Is there anything else I could do for you?'

@Mathetais: <Leave some pagans for me, I'll be joining you in a moment>

@squire: <Good lad, bring me the Double Mace of Pagan Crushing>

[ May 10, 2003, 16:06: Message edited by: chevalier ]

 

Khelben continues his lamer attitude and launches millions of Abi-Dalzim's Horrid Wilting and Fireballs into the area, then sits back orders his soldiers to loot the dead and laughs chaotically!

 

Hey you filthy crawling worm(Khelben). I'm back as I promised. PREPARE TO DIE!!! NO-ONE KILLS MY FELLOW ENEMIES WITH SUCH EVIL MAGIC!

Alexander the Great crosses the bloodstained full of corpses battlefield like a bolt and reaches Khelben. Khelben is not ready for such battle and cannot resist the terrible fury Alexander the Great unleashed. Bang, bang, bang and the skull opens widely.

 

Arabwel has, at this point, sneaked behind Chevalier who just dunked Rallymama, and witgh an evil smirk pushes him to the pond with a great splash.
"Take that, you blue-blooded dolt!" She cheers, and punches the air. "Go me!"
_____________________
(*sniffles* *atchoo*)

 

Chevalier swims worse than his concrete statue, so he's really thankful for his length and that he has no bulky metal on apart from two small bracers. The good thing is that he slowly regains his sobriety.

 

Alexander's greater cleave feat proves very handful as he crushes Khelben's minions who swarmed him after killing their master. After an hour or two Alexander prevailed and stood exhausted on the battlefield with dead bodies around him. He was the only one alive there. Silence spreads over the battlefield and a soft wind starts blowing licking Alexander's face. He is the only one alive here; his warhammer red like his face and his not anymore shiny armor.
He is the winner.

Then he saw it; Talunatain came down from the sky and ressurected everyone. Then Tal said: "Let the battle commence once again" and the chaos started for one more time.
And a loud voice covered the noise of battle: "Chevalier, it is I, Alexander the Great. Do you want to join our forces? We will be unstopable."

[ May 10, 2003, 16:25: Message edited by: Alexander the Great ]

 

Once Harkle's slime body was smacked to pieces and he were resurrected, polymorph spell and wisdom loss didn't affect him anymore.

Harkle saw Alexander, his (bloody) warhammer and platemail. And then he remembered a spell named heat metal.

"I left that scroll in my Backpack of -25% weight! Oh s***, where is my backpack?"

Harkle starts running wildly around the battlefield.

 

Alexander the Great is waiting for an answer from Chevalier but sees Harkle: "My old enemy he said" and headed toward him and crashed his skull.

 

Chevalier modulates his voice to break through the clamour and clatter of battle:

'I shall form alliance with any force of good present'

@Alex: <If you're good-aligned, we're allies>

@squire: <Where are you with that mace?!>

 

(Alex is power-aligned)

The Master of Mischief enters the fray! The first thing he notices is Alexander's shining Mithral Full Plate. Donning his trademark dark sunglasses and trenchcoat, he increases the luminosity of Alexander's plate by ten-fold, effectively blinding everyone in the arena not likewise equipped with sunglasses. Fortunately, no one else is equipped with sunglasses, so the Master is free to work unhindered. He picks up Rallymama's Blankie of Protection from Everything from beside the shallow pond and with a few quick pins makes it the inner lining of his trenchcoat. Detecting the remainder of Rallymama's stash of peanuts, he starts munching away, looking for more trouble to cause.

His eye lights upon a wild man (Harple? Harkon?) running around the field swearing about a backpack. Unable to see where he's going due to the intense light source, Harkle trips over a few dead bodies and lands in the mud, skidding down into the shallow pond water. Above the splash of water the swearing continues.

With a chuckle, MoM turns to find the backpack not ten feet away from him. Opening it, he notes that there are indeed several scrolls within. "Wants it does he? Hope these scrolls are waterproof!" With a maniacal laugh, he tosses the open backpack into the middle of the pond.

Next the Mischief Master sneaks up behind Alexander and pours itch powder into the back of his platemail. Filching the heavy crossbow of accuracy, he replaces it with one that when fired impales itself into the hands of its user.

Spotting Aikanaro floating above the battlefield, he ponders something evil to inflict upon him. A sudden idea comes and he digs in his backpack for his Power Arasol Mosquito Attractant and sprays it up at Aikanaro until he is soaked with it. He then casts Summon Great Mosquito Horde. His insane laughter continues until he realizes that a considerable amount of the Attractant has drifted back onto him as well. With a scream, he flees the approaching Great Mosquito Horde and dives into the pond.

(This is way too much fun! Great idea Sniper!)

 

"Ouch! That hurt!" said Harkle when Alexander the Great crashed his skull.

"Hmm. I really don't want that my skull gets crushed once again. I have to try diplomacy."

@Alex <Let's make peace. You won't attack me and I won't attack you.>

After that, Harkle sees that Capstone has dropped also his scrolls in the water.

"Noooo! My preciousss scrolls!"

 

Apeman nimbly dodged some bodyparts of who ever was slaughtered this time. He jumped up when the head of some unfortunate newbie rolled over to him. He landed again and quietly sat down on his comfortable chair.

He looked to his right, there his faeri dragon was watching the battle with growing anticipation.

"Why don't we join into the fray master?"

"Patient friend it won't be long before my druidic powers shall conquer this place"

Apeman looked around again and saw that the battle wasn't nearing it's end for a long time

"Aaaaaah, Improved invisibility is a bliss!!"

 

"Goodies must die!"

Eze sticks her claws into chevalier's back and pulls them out, while evading two other good-aligned SPers, who try to hold onto her trench coat.(Yes, I am wearing one. )

 

Sephiroth awakes in the room next door her rent because of all that noise. Angrily he stands up and goes to the fighting place, he sees that the forces of evil are loosing, although Eze started to attack Chevalier. So he starts to cast his mighty wild magic, he actually wants to preform a mighty meteor storm, to help the forces of evil, but he recognizes that something is going wrong ! Suddenly the earth starts to rumble and opens and the doorway to hell is open !! Sephiroth recognizes the possibility to ask the mightiest creatures of hell for help. So he shouts at the door guardians:
" Send your evil brothers, the strongest of your creatures for aid" .
The gurdian recognizes Sephiroths unbelievable evilness and accepts his wish.The Gate opens and the most terrible creatures appears, Diablos own childs: The killer chickens and they start to attack every good creature !
Sephiroth laughs and says : "Now your soul will be mine, " and he starts a spell to absorb the souls of fallen goodies !

 

Blog pops out of the shadows from no where and slams his monkish fists +5 into Alexander's back.

Alex the Great spins around and swings his nice enchanted warhammer at Blog's general location, but the quick monk is already gone.

Blessed with the extra speed of a monk, Blog has already hidden himself away, licking his wounded fist.

He vows never again to punch with full force into a sheet of Mythril Full Plate!

 

Nobleman shouts OMG. OMFG, don't break the idiot of the Week Plaque are you crazy!! And Throws Yoda into the Swimming Pool. Its open Swimming Pool Bar people, and its heated By Tal's Balrog!

And no Bloody Maries in the pool! I am talking to you too Mary.

 

The Master of Mischief looks with a satisfied smile on the chaos he has created, but all too soon the luminosity spell wears off, so he conceals himself in a corner.

Until, that is, he notices the impending appearance of Diablos' killer chickens. There being limitations to the Master's chaotic nature, he decides that the chickens must die. Sadly, Harkle's fireball scroll is already ruined, so there will be no Crispy Fried Chicken, but the thought gives him an idea. They were charged to attack all the good ones...

With that thought, he projects KFC's commercials into the brain patterns of all the killer chickens, pouring all his mental capabilities into maintaining the illusion. "It's Mmm mmm good!" the refrain sounds over and over in their minds, as visions of chicken in various edible forms loop round and round. With a horrible cackling sound, the chickens turn on each other and begin tearing each other apart, trying to eat each other alive.

 

With a seeming-casual toss of her head, Rallymama gives Chevalier a solid thwack across the cheek with her sodden ponytail as she slips off to join the neutrals in watching the battle between Good and Evil. There's plenty of room in her Purse of Holding for the spoils.

Meanwhile, Capstone notices that the lining of his cloak is making him feel slightly less-invulnerable, but still snuggy-warm (Mommy-magic doesn't work so well when it's not in close proximity to a Mommy! )

Aside - welcome back, Capstone!

 

Sephiroth gets angry when he sees what the Master of Mischief does with his ultra mega strong chickens, so he starts a spell combo.
At first he cast bann magic, so his chickens don't kill themselves and as second spell he calls words in an old forgotten (and hated ) language: "Fulmen te caeda " and summons a bright bolt wich dazzle the Master of Mischief for two rounds.
Sephiroth laughs because of his supa dupa powers, and thinks of his next move.
After some thinking he gets a brilliant idea and summons the mights of chaos. He summons a small pink elephant, wich immeadetly falls in love with the Master of Mischief and wants to give him a kiss. Now Sephiroth himself is afraid of his great cruellness.

[ May 10, 2003, 20:36: Message edited by: Sephiroth ]