Things I Learned From Playing Video Games

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-Whenever you sit down and rest for a few seconds, you instantly heal all wounds on your body.

-It is possible to throw a fireball at someone.

-Ministers can cast healing spells.

-Churches never do anything if they don't get paid.

-You can carry an unlimited number of bags on you and not be affected at all.

 

Seemingly poor merchants can buy items for millions of gold.

Some walls can be blown up by rocket launchers, others are impossible to destroy.

Rats won't hide in crates while you hack them up with a sword

 

-No matter how many times you kill a beast with your beam cannon, they always come back when you open the door again.

-After you beat a big bad guy all the other litte bad guys(that where hard enough) have grown up really fast to kick your butt faster.

-Remember that you can in fact shoot at the undead if you have energy type weapons.

-Lava is only as deep as you are tall. And you can always jump out of it given that your tumb is not broken.

-Getting pissed at a game in real life only gets you killed faster and more pissed unless your playing a level that you know by heart.

-Bee hives supply an endless amount of gaint wasps that when sting you, make you jump back to catch your balance from the impact.

-Weird simbles always open up doors or new area's, the only catch is that you have to find them all.

-Lava is hot yet you never fell the affects.

-Things get smarter as you go, pretty soon you just let them kill you and look in the forbiden hint book to learn there weak spot.

-Save points arnt just anywhere you want but only in selected area's that are imposable to get to with out fighting all the bad guys you just lost half your life metter too anyways. Maybe this time it'll be easier.....

*All from Metroid Prime.......theres an even harder setting too.....

 

Pirates use insults while swordfighting, the one who comes up with the best replies wins, but when you fight aussies you´ll be danged to lose

During warfare, there are factories spreaded everywhere, producing a soldier per 20 seconds, which can be manufactured with food, tiberium and crystal ore

In strategy your archenemy will attack using chariots, catatpults and phalanxs.. while you got panzers, spitfires and atomic weapons.. during this battle the enemy rejects any diplomacy since he is confident his army will be victorious.

Rabbits and dogs can talk, at this moment theyre solving crimes and finding missing animals

[ December 23, 2002, 13:21: Message edited by: Morgoth ]

 

*You can quicksave before doing just about anything.
*Normal people require one bullet to kill, while "bosses" require maybe a bazooka and six shots in the head.
*No one can kill you unless they drop your HP to zero.
*You can always find ammo for your weapon in any place, grenades too.

 

Ah, thanks Morgoth.

- When you own over 100 solar systems, and a foreign race owns 4, you have 10 of your ships around the orbit of one uninhabited system close to this enemy race. The other race will still come, with no treaty between your races whatsoever, and steal and colonize that system from under the noses your own ships (you refused to attack still). As you respond to this by first demanding politically the ownership of that system, failing, and then annihilating the planet and re-colonizing it with your own ship, the now angered enemy race will scream and whine that this is a war. When next you send one medium-class batteship to one of their 4 planets where they have their most powerful spacestation and their entire space armada, destroy everything within a matter of moments, and leave, they will contact you saying "we will purge the galaxy of [your race] threat". And still, you have to believe that this is actually the greatest political figure of that race. The mastermind of a powerful interstellar-traveling race. And indeed, they claim to have no suicidal thoughts.

- The enemy is never concerned of his own life. If the game has been built so that your fighter's bodies can be passed through to allow an easy attack on your mages (or some such similar situation), then beware! For the programmers shall surely turn this incompetence of their own abilities to their advantage. You will have... CHALLENGE! Yes!

- An example of the previous. If a 3D jumpn'shoot game is done so miserably that no-one can make out anything of the depth perception of the world, you can be sure you'll be doing a lot of jumping on platforms, failing completely as you just barely missed them from the side. This is also called "challenging".

- A true story/fact: The best gamer is not the one who has played the most and warmed up a lot beforehand. The best gamer is the one who has played the most, and kept a fitting pause before the testing of skills. I'm a veteran Starsiege: Tribes player (my nick in here is the same as in the game, so everyone familiar with it should recognize me outright). And every match where I feel the game as something a bit unfamiliar and new, I have to concentrate ten times more on what it is I do. Resulting in an increase of 50% to my normal skills. Which is enough to best most others at any given time. Becoming too accustomed leaves too much for your inner models to deal, and rules out the intellectual approach. Every little thing that is not in programmed into your routine behaviour effectively enough will get missed, or nearly so. Focusing more effort not only draws more experience from your subconscious, but also makes you go through a huge amount of more tactics and potential outcomes of any situation than would otherwise. You cease to be more of a bot, and become more of a human. Someone that with a machine-like experienced mind still possesses the ability to learn from every mistake, analyze every new enemy and genuinely do everything that is possible to avoid failure, instead of thinking "oh what the hell, I've played this for 5 years.. it's not like the world's gonna fall if I just don't bother to fight like my life depended on it". This might seem obvious to many, but I doubt many actually know what I'm really talking about. The reason I use mp3 on the background is this. To get the emotions in the game, to let them give more power for concentration, and to let the concentration drive my abilities over their normal limits. The most important lesson I've ever learned of a game, when reaching for the supreme skill-level.

[ December 23, 2002, 11:28: Message edited by: Forashi ]

 

Well that was certanly a nice life story

 

It was. That's the God's gift to me, and my gift to the world. I suck at putting things the short way.

 

-The term "An army of one" is actually true, since you can actually take on an army by yourself and win.

-Girls tend to run around half-naked and guys are fully clothed.

-Enemies never drop their guns when they die. Apparently they decompose instantly too.

-Whenever you commit a crime, everybody hears about it instantly. Ultrafast intermind internet anyone?

 

everyone basically said everything already but you might have missed one...
-black guys are always the second character with limited abilities!!

 

If you take all the robes/armour of your heroes the males wear brown clothes while the women wear pink lingerie.

If you drop -9999999999 you miraculously gain 9999999999gold pieces.

You can destroy all the building and trees in the village and the villagers wont turn a hair.

Bees can be bright purple.

whatever you wear the avatars hardly change.

Thanks to RoM(Rage of Mages) for these things

 

- In some cases, no matter how much blood you lose, or no matter how many times someone breaks a part of your body you can still fight as if you were at one hundred percent.
- The Mech I walk around in seems to never run out of fuel no matter how many times I use my Jump Jets.
- The very same Mech I walk around in seems to never run out of ammo.
- No matter how smoke-filled or any other types of interferences are present my Mech can *always* lock on to an enemy.
- Everytime I fight something nasty in my Mech some really cool music starts playing.
(The first was from Mortal Kombat: Deadly Alliance and the rest are from Mech Assault.)

 

Whenever you talk to a person, he never gets tired of being asked the same thing over and over again, and will always replie with the same answers

 

No matter where you are everyone speaks the same language so you can understand

 

a twenty sided die is the answer to life's problems.

 

If you go around and kill everyone in sight, a simple trip to the thieves guild will make everyone forget.

Thanks to Morrowind for that one.

 

Monsters carry civilized currency with them. Hmm... they must visit the the shops in town quite often.

Thanks to Earthbound for poking fun at this.

 

-You can sell to the merchant and the steal it again and repeat that as long as you want

-people dont mind having armed hooligans in their houses robbing their houses.

-Nobody is bothered having demons from hell before them until they get hit, then the whole town instantly knows about it.

 

You can run around swinging a sword and jumping in circles, and nobody will think your crazy. If you go into a store, and pick up a nice dagger to examine it, suddenly everyone in town knows, and is out to kill you.

 

-There is no law enforcement, so you can do whatever you feel like.

-Evil people act exactly the same as good people. (Thanks to D&D RPGs for this one).

-Monsters only hate you, not townsfolk or other species of monster.